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My reality

Posted 04-10-2010 at 01:44 PM by malone7384

The one thing that I do find myself doing - even a year and a half after surgery is comparing my weight loss to others. I have to keep remind myself that my reality is not going to be someone else's reality.

I know that I have done pretty darn good. Right now I am fluctuating between 193 and 195. I have been doing this for the last couple of months. I honestly cannot remember the last time that was below 200 pounds. I am now wearing a size 16/18 (and sometimes a 14) and that is down from 36 pants that were getting too tight and 4x shirts.

At my highest weight of 340 I had reached the point where I could no longer buy clothes even at Lane Bryant. Now I can go in to just about any store and find something that will fit. I love being able to go in to JC Penney or Macy's and finding something to fit me. And now I am not at the back of the rack but closer to the front. This is a total rush.

The best part of my reality is that my daughter can now put her arms all the way around me and have her hands touch at my back.

Unfortunately the other part of my reality is that the weight loss has not helped my arthritis at all. I am now rated as severe and pretty much live on Vicodin for pain and I get Remicade infusions every 6 weeks. I was really hoping that losing the weight would really help but it hasn't. This is a part of my life and of the reality of my future.

But, I do know that having the surgery saved my life. My blood pressure is normal. I have no more sleep apnea. My cholestrol is normal now.

Do I like taking the vitamins every day? Nope. But I also know that it is something that I have to do for the rest of my life. I spend a little bit more to get the good vitamins. If I have to take them then I am going to make sure that I am taking high quality ones. After all, I'm worth it right?
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