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Posted 01-22-2009 at 01:56 PM by stylindi

OK its mbirfday. 37. Im really loving getting older and for once , what im saying is NOT dripping in sarcasm.
I went shopping yesterday and bought another pair of jeans and two shirts. Things fit strangly ..some styles fit smaller than others..we like those ones, but hey, ill wear the same size as before without feeling badly as long as it looks good. I do however feel that some designers need their heads read. Just for kicks i tried on one of those suck you in sausage covers for your body. Like a whole body girdle. The onyl thing i LOVED about it was how great my back felt wearing it. Do they ever feel good on your lower back. I didnt know my lower back was so tired before trying on the sausage wrapper. Other than that.. i just didnt want it. It could be deamed nessecary .. i suppose. K , who in their right mind would put 4 bra clasps in the critch? ... i dont know about anyone else..but can you imagine going potty and trying to do that thing back up ? Sitting in a wee bathroom stall ? Nope cant picture it mself. Perhaps there is already something on youtube.. cmon someone please do a demonstrational video and post it. Ok so the thing DID help conceal the wee flab that overhangs my jeans... but not 80 bucks worth of concealment..maybe 35..but not 80. Which reminds me..remember in the mid 90s when some intelligent designer decided to put the fly in the BACK of the pants. Dress pants in a size 24 SHOULD NOT have the zipper in the back...not even the side. I just think ppl should run their ideas by ME before putting them into mass production. I NEVER undid that zipper.. i hauled those suckers up over EVERYTHING. SUCK AND TUCK!
I had a moment with a dump last night. What i was thinking i dont know. An hour later i was concious again. I was making a munchie platter, veggies and melba toast, and for the non surgical ppl int he house, asiago and spinach dip , lite cream cheese and havarti, and turkey kolbassa coil. Well, i tasted the dip on a lil peice of celery, i dipped not scooped. A tiny piece of cheese broke off the perfect slice, and my dull knife cut the first slice of kolbassa crooked so it was half a slice... i put the cheese on the sausage..and ate it. The haze started, i heated up, myheart started.. i put the platter ont he coffee table and announced i was hitting the bathtub. I went to bed. Prayed to god, tried to breathe on time. An hour later i was concious again and ran the bath. DUMB DUMB DUMB...K i got it now. No more eating the mistakes in the kitchen.
I finally called the local dietician. I honestly have missed every appt ive had with my surgeon and dietician in toronto since my surgery 2 months yesterday. There is absolutely NO way i can get there. I am recovering from my surgery financially as well and not catching up to darn quickly. Not only that but the boss i had before my surgery stiffed me for a whole months pay and refuses to give me any government paperwork required to file for assitance...cuz he will have his ass FRIED by the government. So no i dont have the money to get to Toronto therefore i havent gone. However as i mentioned i have called the local dietician. She has never dealt with a bariatric patient before .. im excited for her.LOL. I did forsee the issue coming and tried to prepare ..but no one seems to believe that i can NOT get to Toronto. Who cant get on a bus? That would be me. Its 50 bucks for the bus round trip...oh actually 60 something with tax..unless i could get my appt on a wednesday then its half price. But then there is the ground transport IN toronto...uh...i would need so many tranquilzers i would never make it. Nope. As far as seeing my surgeon about the heartburn etc..cant see it happenin. Guess we will see if my family doctor read the books i gave him. Cuz i did give him books. The Physicians Guide to Weightloss Surgery. Hope what he needs to know was in it and that he read it on the plane to sweden for holidays. My concerns are mainly the heartburn..cant envision a day without pepcid. Then there is the LASTING chest pains after a dumping moment. I just dont think the chest pains should last that long after recovering...nope just dont think they should.
K im off to an appt to see if i can better my life. Im TRYING to get back into school to be something ELSE. Hair is FUN , but after 20 years..id like to use the mind i have for something more challenging. I have a whole team of ppl looking for a loophole in SOMETHING somewhere to find me funding for school. I also think that intelligent ppl should have money thrown at them at any age if they are smart enough to make a difference in something important..ie, med school. But no..ive gotta find a loophole.
K birfday... here i come.
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