[kitcatcopycat]

California

Straw that broke the camels back.

I have been heavyset all of my life and have tried every diet known to man. I had given up on marriage or even having children (I was told I would never have children by three doctors). March 2003 I got into a car accident due to a horrific panic attack. I was forced to realize I had to deal with my past. Later that year I met my soon to be husband (of whom I imported from West Africa). I was 250 lbs and had finally found someone who accepted me for me. He did not care if I could not have children. We were married and ended up having a honeymoon baby (yes doctors are wrong)! Nine months later I gave birth to a healthy baby girl. When she was born in 2004 I was 283 pounds. Time passed and I became pregnant again in 2006. My weight creep up to 309 pounds by February 2008.

My husband was asked to be a close friend’s best man in New York. Without hesitation we bought our plane tickets. It had been 3 years since I had been on a plane. I was not comfortable the last time I was on a plane, but I did fit in the seat. I quickly realized 26 more pounds made a huge difference. The plane was packed out. I picked a seat in the emergency section/row thinking I would have more room. Yes there was plenty of leg room, but there was one problem I did not factor in ‘my behind’. I took a deep breath and shoved myself into the middle seat between to other big men. I WAS STUCK!! I had never been so embarrassed in my entire life. There I was stuck with my husband on the other side of the plane. I asked the gentlemen beside me to hit the call button as there was no way I was going to be able to sit thru a six hour flight that way. Side note – emergency section seats do not have movable arm rests.

Another gentleman compassionately traded seats with me. I was fortunate that the flight attendant did not make me pay for another seat. Though I would not have blamed her. She may not have been able to do so as there were only able to trade me out to another seat.

As soon as we got back from New York I immediately made an appointment with my PCP. I went in and insisted that she write a referral to see a WLS Surgeon for a consult. In the past I had been totally against anyone having the surgery but I was desperate. Something had to change, I had to change, I needed help.

It took several months before I got in to see the surgeon. Specifically July 2008. I was disappointed after my appointment as the surgeon refused to do the surgery without blood. I told the surgeon if you can’t do it without blood it was too risky for me and not worth it. I did not have any health issues that would of required me to have blood. I later found out he was a sloppy surgeon.

I went home and discussed my situation with a friend of mine that had the surgery in San Francisco. She said that her surgeon never made her sign anything in regards to blood. Upon hearing that I called the surgeon back and asked for a second opinion. He submitted the second opinion and I received a call in August.

The second consult (Dr. Laura Machado) was extremely different. The surgeon was very confident and said she had never heard of having to transfuse. In fact in her six years in baratric surgery she had never preformed a blood transfusion.

She submitted for approval and my insurance approved it in ten days. After 8 months I was finally approved. They gave me a surgery date of December 1, 2008.

Between September and December I went through all of my blood work, tests, Pysch & Nutritional program.

December 1st came fast and my husband became desperate himself. He offered me a car in hopes I would not go through with it. He begged me saying, ‘I love you just the way you are! Why do you want to change what I love’?

I was so deeply touched by how much my husband adored me and realized I was very fortunate. But I wanted to be healthy, I wanted to be able to play with my girls, I wanted to live!

Anyone that knows me well, knows I have horrible anxiety issues (I have survived rape and being stalked twice - I deal with PTSD, Bi-Polar, Depression, Panic Attacks & Agoraphobia). I did not realize that the surgeon would not allow my husband to be with me in the pre-op room. So there I sat all by myself, crying, having one panic attack after another. My surgeon walked in and wanted to know what was wrong. I told her I was having second thoughts. She looked me straight in the eye and said, ‘You don’t have to have this surgery. I have three other patients waiting to go in. But you need this surgery; I am the best in this business. I will have you in and out in an hour. So what is going to be’? I told her, ‘let’s go’.

She kept her promise, everything went perfect. When I woke up I felt as if a freight train had run me over. But within the week I was off the pain meds.

It has been an emotional roller coaster over the last 18 months, but I made it. I reached goal (170 pounds) in 9 months losing 139lbs. By my 1 year post-op appointment was down to 141 (168 lb loss / 127.5 inches fone forever). My surgeon has used me four times for her 'before & after' seminar. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought 12 months later I would be a size 6/8!

I have been maintaining for 25 months and loving every minute of it.

On the onset I mentioned having to deal with my past. This surgery does not solve the emotionally & physical things of the past. I am still dealing with them. Some days are better then others.

[Jackie L]

Thanks for sharing your experience with the weight loss surgery, it is very encouraging!!! Keep up the good work, your post will surely help me to keep on the right path. THANKS!!

[steinkat]

Thank you for sharing your story. I have a husband that loves me very much and says he loves me just the way I am. I wish his warm words would do it for me, but like you I hate myself the way I am, and I have tried everything to lose weight without success.

[mj2903]

I think many of us are in the same or similar positions, my husband is very concerned that I will die from the surgery even though the chances of me dying without it early are so much greater without the surgery (as are his, but he isn't considering the surgery...yet) He has not fully come to grips-comfort wise with me having the surgery but he does know it is coming up and when I will go on the liquid diet.(2 weeks) I know he is just concerned.

I think that many people are more familiar with the horror stories of 10-15 years (or more ago) than with current statistics and complications (kind and rates) The hospital I am going to had a surgeon that had quite a few deaths around 10 years ago, he moved on and in 2003 a brand new hospital program was introduced as a partnership with the surgeons. But people still remember the other surgeon and his very highly broadcasted mortality rates.

The last death from this program was in 2003 and was from a blood clot, and I believe that risk is now reduced because of the lovenox shots required after surgery.

[Chevygal55]

Thanks for sharing your story with us. You have been thru so much! I am so happy for you that your surgery has gone so well~

[najwamama]

Thank for sharing this story it brought tears to my eyes and it made me see that sometimes when I am down about nonsense I should just realize someone else has it way tougher than me! Gd Bless you and keep going cause I know I am!

[shasha]

Your amazing! You've gone through so much and come so far. Thanks for your story! Keep up the good work!

[kaytijo]

Thanks for sharing, gives me that "light at the end of a tunnel" feeling...I need that right now!!

[bela]

Thanks for sharing your story. You're such an inspiration!

[Ebonidoll]

Thank you sooo much for sharing your story.... and i am happy you made the change for yourself...

"it's all a process"