[freebird]

TOP 5 DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR BOSS!!

1. When you take a long time, you're slow. Your boss is thorough.
2. When you mae a mistake, you're and idiot. Your boss is only human.
3. When you're out of the office, you're wandering around. Your boss is on business.
4. When you don't do it, you're lazy. Your boss is on business.
5. When you do something withou being told, you're overstepping your authority. Your boss is taking initiative.

[MSmom]

Hey Freebird....
Have you met my boss!!! You have just described him to a tee, especially "out on business" part!!!
that is too funny, I am thinking about sending him that quote, wonder if it would get me fired...lol

[bren]

Thats almost funny.. just kidding it was funny except for the fact I'm second in line to my boss and have people under me...LOL

[freebird]

(Tehee)...sorry Bren.

Here's another work related one for you all today

The top 27 Things you wish you could say at work

1. I can see your point, but i still think you're full of s***
2. I have plenty talent and vision, i just don't care
3.How about never? Is never good for you
4. It sounds like English, but i can't understand a word you're saying
5. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public
6. Ahhh, I see the f***-up fairy has visited us again
7. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers
8. I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.
9. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist
10. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject
11. I will always cherish the initial misxonceptions i had about you
12. I don't know what our problem is, but i'll bet it's hard to pronounce
13. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental
14. I like you. You remind me of when i was young and stupid
15. What am i? Fly paper for freaks?
16. I'm not being rude, you're just insignificant
17. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view
18. It's a thankless job, but i've got a lot of Karma to burn off
19. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely cerimonial
20 No my powers can ony be used for good
21. I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me
22. You sound reasonable.....time to up my medications.
23. I'll try being nicer if you try being smarter
24. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message
25. I don't work here, i'm a consultant
26. Who me? I just wander from room to room
27. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys

AND NOW USEFUL STATEMENTS FOR THOSE HIGH STREE DAYS

1. Well, aren't we just a ray of sunshine?
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. Do I look like a people person?
4. This isn't an office. It's Hell with flourescent lighting
6. I pretend to work They pretend to pay me
7. YOU! Off my planet
8. Practice random acts of intelligence and sensless acts of self - control
9. I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes
10. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
11. And your cry-baby, whiny-butt opinion would be....?
12. How many times do i have to flush before you go away?
13. AAWWW!! Did i step on your poor little bitty ego?
14. How do i set a laser printer to stun
15. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly, terribly alert.
16. When i want your opinion, i'll give it to you
17. Earth is Full, Go home.
18. Don't piss me off i'm running out of room to hide the bodies.
19. I'm tired. Can you slap yorself?

[Pillows]

Okay so I love these.... I will have to save these to read to hubby later.
Has anyone read The Rules according to MEN? I will have to get around to posting it later when I have a few minutes.
Janae