I am scared - Please help me through this

grandiose16 · 01-24-2007, 10:06 AM

I am beginning to doubt myself. I have so many mixed emotions. I feel like I am admitting defeat. Why can't I lose weight on my own? Is this what God really wants me to do? I am ashamed of myself that I am not a more disciplined person. I had a friend that died from complications from this surgery 2 yrs. ago. I am confused and scared. One day I am confident and the next day doubting my decision. Is this normal? Plus I have never had a surgery in my life. So this BIG on so many levels. Do any of you regret going through with it? I need help. PLEASE!! Am I doing the right thing? ANd yes I am doing it for me not for anyone else. It was my decision, BUT is it the right one?

DocSanae · 01-24-2007, 10:34 AM

You are soooo normal.
Everyone goes through the very same roller coaster emotions you are going through.
If you went through all the posts here, you'll probably be amazed how everyone goes through these ups and downs.
Why not go back to the old posts of the apparently successful WLSers on this board who were pre-ops when they first came on board, starting with FemmeMode and Pillows and a host of others.

Medically speaking, keep in mind this is one of the recommended methods of losing weight, along with the conventional way. Do not think of yourself as a not disciplined person because you weren't able to lose and keep off the weight the conventional way. Because you are going to need all the discipline and self control you have in keeping the surgery a success. It is going to be a lot of hard work getting there and staying there, the rest of your life.

(((((((((HUGS)))))))))

mike · 01-24-2007, 10:35 AM

Grandiose,
I am sorry that you are having a hard time with this. I assure you, though, it is perfectly normal what you are feeling right now. Before, my surgery, I almost backed out of it because I didn't know if I had what it took to be one of many many success stories. Alot of different things ran through my mind. BELIEVE ME! I wouldn't change one thing that has come of my having the surgery. There really is nothing negative that I can think of right now, that would sway my life changing decision. HONEST! So many positives have come out of it. The biggest thing for me was, did I have what it took to change my very unhealthy eating habits, and the fact that before the surgery, I could pack away an enormous amount of food. I LOVE TO EAT, AND STILL DO. I was terrified that I would start eating and eating and not knowing when to quit, stretching my stomach out once again. It does all fall into place, once you are on the road to weightloss, I assure you. It is good though, that you are posting your questions, so people like me, and so many others can ease your gitters. Way out the pros and cons of having it done, grandiose, and see which one ways out by a loooooooooooong shot. Not many cons are there? STAY STRONG, SWEETIE, and stick with those of us who know exactly what you are going throug. WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU.

mike

grandiose16 · 01-24-2007, 11:11 AM

Docsanae, I will do as you suggest on looking back at the beginning of success stories.

Mike, This is what scares me too. I LOVE TO EAT. I am not a sweet eater or a binge eater or a nervous eater, or a snack eater. It's just when I sit down to eat I eat A LOT. Will I really be able to control that later. Will the want to still be there? I know the "able to" will not? THen you train yourself from there? You are one of my biggest encouragements when I read your thought and experiences. There are many good ones. But you are always so upbeat. Thanks for your help.

I did just get a call from the Dr. that my Doppler on my legs and the ultrasound on my rt. kidney, gall bladder, pancreas & Liver were fine so that is it for all the test. Now waiting on a date.

fr1endly2 · 01-24-2007, 01:22 PM

((((HUGS)))))))))

just wanted to tell you i was the HUGE portion eater tooo!!!!
ANd now i say that my birth defect is fixed and i eat like a normal
women. ITS funny i now pic the smallest pizza slice, the tinest baked
potatoe not the largest. I can honestly say that you will doo fine!!
I have.
I have alot of eating issues portions and love for food one of them!
hugs
and its normal to flip flop on your choice and get nervous
hugs

I dont regret my deicision!!! I think i did for a few hours the first sunday home from the hospitol but never since!!!! ITS the greatest thing i have done for me and my health even when i struggle like i do now to eat right and make right choices. EVEN when i had some dark depressed days post op i still didnt regret it ...but overcame things and stood tall.

mike · 01-24-2007, 10:53 PM

Thank you for the compliment, grandiose.

Like I said before in one of my other posts, I have lost all the weight I want to lose. Everyone has been there for me through my weightloss. THEY ARE ALL AWESOME PEOPLE HERE AND I LOVE THEM FOR IT VERY MUCH. Now, it's my turn to give as much support to those who need it. IT MAKES ME FEEL REALLY GOOD. You mentioned the kind of eater you are not. I WAS ALL THAT YOU MENTIONED, and still am in a way some days. EXCEPT FOR OVEREATING. LOL That part of me, had to be trained, LITERALLY, to deal with stress and whatever wanted to make me eat. IT IS VERY HARD SOME DAYS. The object for me was to go for a walk, clean the already clean house, do the laundry, etc., just so I don't eat. Even now, I have to do that. Everyone has to find their own way of dealing with their old eating habits, so they don't come back to haunt you later. You will realize this to. Their does come a time, when you really start noticing the weightloss, that something takes over in your mind. SOUNDS WEIRD, BUT TRUE. That is when you know you are going to be ok, with the new ways of eating that you will acquire. You are right about not being able to eat alot part. lol As you get farther out though, you will be able to, and that is where you really have to be careful. At that point, you are feeling great, can eat a much bigger variety of food, and you feel like you have licked what caused you to become heavy. DON'T EVER LET YOUR GAURD DOWN FOR A MINUTE. Sure, we all have fallen off the wagon. JUST DON'T LET IT BE A DAILY THING. You are going to be fine, grandiose. You have the perfect attitude for what this journey takes. I am babbling now, so I will shush up. YAH, I AM A TRUE SOCIAL BUG. LOL
mike

howietam · 01-26-2007, 03:23 PM

Grandiose,
I'm pretty new here, but I will say that I went through the same thoughts. I even backed out once and had to reschedule my surgery. It's a big step and it's no wonder you are feeling anxiety. I believe we all had doubts and fears. But, I can honestly say that now I am glad I had the surgery. I am feeling so much better, and I've had so many people comment on how much better, and younger I look...and I've still got a long way to go.
Keep the faith. I think first and foremost, God wants his children to be happy and healthy.

twinmzpeachez · 01-28-2007, 11:25 AM

Hi Grandiose I'm from Illinois and I just want to say that I've been there also and yes you get stuck sometime but that is when you need to pick yourself up.And I'm sorry to hear about your friend.You have a chance for a better you and yes it is ok to be scared you're only human.When ever you need to chat with someone please get online and someone will be here for you. I need you as much as much as you need me. I've been having a hard time loosing weight as well but I know this will help me out a great deal.I will keep you in my Prayers.Ther is so much support here.

Peachez

cabbie · 01-28-2007, 02:08 PM

Hi Grandiose,
Definitely had the flip flop thing here and now being six months out I am so glad I went through! What ever choice you choose we will be here for you but the nervousness that you are expierience has affected us all! We are here to tell you we are healthy and alive and are here for you every step of the way! Please don't ever hesitate to ask for our support that is what we are here for!

CherishMeForever · 01-30-2007, 04:30 AM

oh yessss... you are so normal in having these thoughts. When I started this process Aug 2006....I swear I changed my mind a 1,000 times. When I found this forum (mind you that I already had my surgical date for atleast one month prior)....I knew then that it was the right thing for me to do....there was no question in my mind....NONE...NASSA, ZILCH, ZIPPO

Please keep us posted on when you date is. I am glad all your utrasounds came back good....hang in there....we will hold your hand the entire way!

Valerie***

01-24-2007, 10:06 AM	#1 (permalink)
grandiose16 WLS Master Guru Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Cuero, South Texas Posts: 524 Weight Statistics May 1, 2007 Start Date: June 25, 2007 Surgery Date: Please Enter Height: 270 lb Start Weight: 200 lb Current Weight: 130 lb Goal Weight: 70 lb Weight Loss: 70 lb Lb Left to Lose: 25.9259259259 % % Lost: June 25, 2008 Goal Date: Body Mass Index 45.83 BMI Start: 35.2 BMI Current: 22.31 BMI Goal: Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass	I am scared - Please help me through this I am beginning to doubt myself. I have so many mixed emotions. I feel like I am admitting defeat. Why can't I lose weight on my own? Is this what God really wants me to do? I am ashamed of myself that I am not a more disciplined person. I had a friend that died from complications from this surgery 2 yrs. ago. I am confused and scared. One day I am confident and the next day doubting my decision. Is this normal? Plus I have never had a surgery in my life. So this BIG on so many levels. Do any of you regret going through with it? I need help. PLEASE!! Am I doing the right thing? ANd yes I am doing it for me not for anyone else. It was my decision, BUT is it the right one? __________________ Grandiose16 Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams.

01-24-2007, 10:34 AM	#2 (permalink)
DocSanae Super Moderator Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tokyo, Japan Posts: 8,925 Blog Entries: 2 5' 5" Height:	You are soooo normal. Everyone goes through the very same roller coaster emotions you are going through. If you went through all the posts here, you'll probably be amazed how everyone goes through these ups and downs. Why not go back to the old posts of the apparently successful WLSers on this board who were pre-ops when they first came on board, starting with FemmeMode and Pillows and a host of others. Medically speaking, keep in mind this is one of the recommended methods of losing weight, along with the conventional way. Do not think of yourself as a not disciplined person because you weren't able to lose and keep off the weight the conventional way. Because you are going to need all the discipline and self control you have in keeping the surgery a success. It is going to be a lot of hard work getting there and staying there, the rest of your life. (((((((((HUGS))))))))) __________________ "In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun." Just a li'l bit 'bout myself

01-24-2007, 10:35 AM	#3 (permalink)
mike WLS Master Guru Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: i live in wisconsin Posts: 578 5' 5" Height: 30 BMI Goal:	Awwwwww! Grandiose, I am sorry that you are having a hard time with this. I assure you, though, it is perfectly normal what you are feeling right now. Before, my surgery, I almost backed out of it because I didn't know if I had what it took to be one of many many success stories. Alot of different things ran through my mind. BELIEVE ME! I wouldn't change one thing that has come of my having the surgery. There really is nothing negative that I can think of right now, that would sway my life changing decision. HONEST! So many positives have come out of it. The biggest thing for me was, did I have what it took to change my very unhealthy eating habits, and the fact that before the surgery, I could pack away an enormous amount of food. I LOVE TO EAT, AND STILL DO. I was terrified that I would start eating and eating and not knowing when to quit, stretching my stomach out once again. It does all fall into place, once you are on the road to weightloss, I assure you. It is good though, that you are posting your questions, so people like me, and so many others can ease your gitters. Way out the pros and cons of having it done, grandiose, and see which one ways out by a loooooooooooong shot. Not many cons are there? STAY STRONG, SWEETIE, and stick with those of us who know exactly what you are going throug. WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU. mike

01-24-2007, 11:11 AM	#4 (permalink)
grandiose16 WLS Master Guru Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Cuero, South Texas Posts: 524 Weight Statistics May 1, 2007 Start Date: June 25, 2007 Surgery Date: Please Enter Height: 270 lb Start Weight: 200 lb Current Weight: 130 lb Goal Weight: 70 lb Weight Loss: 70 lb Lb Left to Lose: 25.9259259259 % % Lost: June 25, 2008 Goal Date: Body Mass Index 45.83 BMI Start: 35.2 BMI Current: 22.31 BMI Goal: Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass	I really appreciate your responses Docsanae, I will do as you suggest on looking back at the beginning of success stories. Mike, This is what scares me too. I LOVE TO EAT. I am not a sweet eater or a binge eater or a nervous eater, or a snack eater. It's just when I sit down to eat I eat A LOT. Will I really be able to control that later. Will the want to still be there? I know the "able to" will not? THen you train yourself from there? You are one of my biggest encouragements when I read your thought and experiences. There are many good ones. But you are always so upbeat. Thanks for your help. I did just get a call from the Dr. that my Doppler on my legs and the ultrasound on my rt. kidney, gall bladder, pancreas & Liver were fine so that is it for all the test. Now waiting on a date. __________________ Grandiose16 Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams.

01-24-2007, 01:22 PM	#5 (permalink)
fr1endly2 Seasoned Veteran Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: SOMEPLACE LONG ISLAND, NY Posts: 6,756 Weight Statistics June 1, 2005 Start Date: Please Enter Height: 310 lb Start Weight: 167 lb Current Weight: 159 lb Goal Weight: 143 lb Weight Loss: 8 lb Lb Left to Lose: 46.1290322581 % % Lost: Body Mass Index 51 BMI Start: 27 BMI Current: Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass	((((HUGS))))))))) just wanted to tell you i was the HUGE portion eater tooo!!!! ANd now i say that my birth defect is fixed and i eat like a normal women. ITS funny i now pic the smallest pizza slice, the tinest baked potatoe not the largest. I can honestly say that you will doo fine!! I have. I have alot of eating issues portions and love for food one of them! hugs and its normal to flip flop on your choice and get nervous hugs I dont regret my deicision!!! I think i did for a few hours the first sunday home from the hospitol but never since!!!! ITS the greatest thing i have done for me and my health even when i struggle like i do now to eat right and make right choices. EVEN when i had some dark depressed days post op i still didnt regret it ...but overcame things and stood tall. __________________ LISA http://w5.photobucket.com/widgets/dy...164/fr1endly2/ LAP RNY Gastric Bypass



Home Forums Chat Member Blogs News Information eStore® Recipes Reflections

	Weight Loss Surgery Insurance
	Yes, you can often get insurance cover for your Weight Loss Surgery. Our own Craig "Big-T" Thompson has been there and done that, and he's written an e-book about it.

01-24-2007, 10:53 PM	#6 (permalink)
mike WLS Master Guru Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: i live in wisconsin Posts: 578 5' 5" Height: 30 BMI Goal:	It's Me! Lol Thank you for the compliment, grandiose. Like I said before in one of my other posts, I have lost all the weight I want to lose. Everyone has been there for me through my weightloss. THEY ARE ALL AWESOME PEOPLE HERE AND I LOVE THEM FOR IT VERY MUCH. Now, it's my turn to give as much support to those who need it. IT MAKES ME FEEL REALLY GOOD. You mentioned the kind of eater you are not. I WAS ALL THAT YOU MENTIONED, and still am in a way some days. EXCEPT FOR OVEREATING. LOL That part of me, had to be trained, LITERALLY, to deal with stress and whatever wanted to make me eat. IT IS VERY HARD SOME DAYS. The object for me was to go for a walk, clean the already clean house, do the laundry, etc., just so I don't eat. Even now, I have to do that. Everyone has to find their own way of dealing with their old eating habits, so they don't come back to haunt you later. You will realize this to. Their does come a time, when you really start noticing the weightloss, that something takes over in your mind. SOUNDS WEIRD, BUT TRUE. That is when you know you are going to be ok, with the new ways of eating that you will acquire. You are right about not being able to eat alot part. lol As you get farther out though, you will be able to, and that is where you really have to be careful. At that point, you are feeling great, can eat a much bigger variety of food, and you feel like you have licked what caused you to become heavy. DON'T EVER LET YOUR GAURD DOWN FOR A MINUTE. Sure, we all have fallen off the wagon. JUST DON'T LET IT BE A DAILY THING. You are going to be fine, grandiose. You have the perfect attitude for what this journey takes. I am babbling now, so I will shush up. YAH, I AM A TRUE SOCIAL BUG. LOL mike

01-26-2007, 03:23 PM	#7 (permalink)
howietam Guru In Training Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Kentucky Posts: 216 Weight Statistics 11-30-06 Start Date: 5' 5" Height: 236 lb Start Weight: 139 lb Current Weight: 155 lb Goal Weight: 97 lb Weight Loss: -16 lb Lb Left to Lose: 41.1016949153 % % Lost: 11-30-07 Goal Date: Body Mass Index 39.2681656805 BMI Start: 23.1282840237 BMI Current: 25.7905325444 BMI Goal:	Grandiose, I'm pretty new here, but I will say that I went through the same thoughts. I even backed out once and had to reschedule my surgery. It's a big step and it's no wonder you are feeling anxiety. I believe we all had doubts and fears. But, I can honestly say that now I am glad I had the surgery. I am feeling so much better, and I've had so many people comment on how much better, and younger I look...and I've still got a long way to go. Keep the faith. I think first and foremost, God wants his children to be happy and healthy. __________________ Tammy surgery date 11/30/06 It's never too late to be what you want to be. Keep looking forward, never back.

01-28-2007, 11:25 AM	#8 (permalink)
twinmzpeachez Newbie Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ILL. Posts: 9 Please Enter Height:	Put your hand in my hand and together we will make it Hi Grandiose I'm from Illinois and I just want to say that I've been there also and yes you get stuck sometime but that is when you need to pick yourself up.And I'm sorry to hear about your friend.You have a chance for a better you and yes it is ok to be scared you're only human.When ever you need to chat with someone please get online and someone will be here for you. I need you as much as much as you need me. I've been having a hard time loosing weight as well but I know this will help me out a great deal.I will keep you in my Prayers.Ther is so much support here. Peachez

01-28-2007, 02:08 PM	#9 (permalink)
cabbie WLS Guru Join Date: May 2006 Location: South Carolina Posts: 372 Weight Statistics July 11,2006 Start Date: July 11,2006 Surgery Date: Please Enter Height: 235 lb Start Weight: 132 lb Current Weight: 135 lb Goal Weight: 103 lb Weight Loss: -3 lb Lb Left to Lose: 43.829787234 % % Lost: July 11,2007 Goal Date: Body Mass Index 41 BMI Start: 22 BMI Current: 22 BMI Goal: Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass	Hi Grandiose, Definitely had the flip flop thing here and now being six months out I am so glad I went through! What ever choice you choose we will be here for you but the nervousness that you are expierience has affected us all! We are here to tell you we are healthy and alive and are here for you every step of the way! Please don't ever hesitate to ask for our support that is what we are here for! __________________ Courtney - Lap RYGB 7/11/2006 "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. " Philippians 4:13

01-30-2007, 04:30 AM	#10 (permalink)
CherishMeForever Guru In Training Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Upstate, NY Posts: 285 Weight Statistics 1-22-07 Surgery Date: Please Enter Height: 225 lb Start Weight: 154 lb Current Weight: 125 lb Goal Weight: 71 lb Weight Loss: 29 lb Lb Left to Lose: 31.5555555556 % % Lost: Body Mass Index 41 BMI Start: 31 BMI Current: 29 BMI Goal: Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass	oh yessss... you are so normal in having these thoughts. When I started this process Aug 2006....I swear I changed my mind a 1,000 times. When I found this forum (mind you that I already had my surgical date for atleast one month prior)....I knew then that it was the right thing for me to do....there was no question in my mind....NONE...NASSA, ZILCH, ZIPPO Please keep us posted on when you date is. I am glad all your utrasounds came back good....hang in there....we will hold your hand the entire way! Valerie* __________________ Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless !!**

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
scared and need help with insurance	helpformom	Gastric Bypass Insurance	5	02-12-2007 08:26 PM
I'm scared!!	howietam	Coffee Talk	6	01-24-2007 07:46 AM
Scared!!!	malbel635	Your Profile	16	10-31-2006 10:53 PM
Help me... so scared!	pugmama	Coffee Talk	5	08-26-2006 12:27 PM
A little scared......	Robbin	Gastric Bypass Diet	3	05-22-2006 10:39 PM