[RePete07]

Hey guys, I just needed to let off some steam. I am sitting at my computer crying my eyes out right now, because my husband has to leave for a month tomorrow morning, and I simply don't know what I am going to do! I still can't drive, I still have to have help getting up and down, especially getting out of bed, I can't lift anything, and I can't let the dogs out, because I am scared they will jump on my belly. Shot! I can't even take the trash out to the curb the can is HUGE!!! I just don't know what to do. He talked to his commander and first sergeant, and they won't let him stay, they told him to tell me to call the FRG, and if something happens, send a red-cross message. That makes me furious!!! What if something happens, and I CANT send a red-cross message! I don't even know where he is going to be. I feel hopeless!!!

[beckamarie]

Phyllis Ann I am so sorry, I know how bad this sucks. I dont have any suggestions but I just wanted to offer you my support

[fr1endly2]

(((HUG)))) PHYLLIS!
HARD HARD HARD!
take a breath and relax.
ITS not gonna be easy but you can do it.
PERHAPS you can look into a home health aide
to come in and do a few things for you for another
week while you recover...
i am sure there are options out there.
I know no one can do like a husband but
just trying to be helpful.
IF you need a shoulder give me a call
anytime any hour!!!!
HUGS!

[fr1endly2]

okay another thought.....
can you keep in touch with your husband via TEXT messages on cell phones! ITs proly worth the extra fee for a service on your phones to keep in touch.
I know i use them alot!
I sent them via my computer to my hubbies cell phone when i need
him to phone home????
JUST more thoughts to help you.
HUGS

[RePete07]

yes, he is going to TX. for training. I will be able to talk to him, but it's still not the same as having him here. I know I am just feeling sorry for myself, but I am so scared that something is going to happen to me, and no one will be around.

[CherishMeForever]

I know how you feel ....I cried like a baby when my husband finally had to go back to work when I was post op too! I had the same problems....getting in and out of bed....just walking was a true effort but I managed. Do you have family or friends you can call for help? In my case, I didn't but I was lucky enough to have my husband to call if I needed help and thankfully my husbands boss is wonderful and a dear friiend of mine....so I was lucky but I still cried...it was hard to be alone. I wish I lived closer to you Phyllis....I wished I could help you but, in closing, let me say this.....since he has gone back to work, I haven't needed him once.....again, I was very lucky. It did help that he wasn't around....it pushed me to do things and the more I could do by myself, the better I felt. We are here for you.....

Hugs,
Valerie****

[wls-surgery]

I'm sorry to hear about this. I spent a number of years in the military and I know how it can be at times. I guess you don't have any other fmaily you can get to stay with you for a while. I'm not sure it would be possible, but maybe you could get in touch with hospice and maybe they can send someone by to help you every day. Just an idea and I'm not sure they do anything for someone who is not terminal.

Bruce

[colosn0w]

I remeber miltary families being tight. Are there any friends that you have met so far? Another thought is to call the base Chaplain...I don't hol much hope for the Red Cross, as I had a bad experience when my husband was in Viet Nam in the late 60's-early 70's.
Worse case senario, contact me and I will come down this weekend and help you. I live in Aurora and my daughter lives in just north of the Springs. When was your WLS? Mine is scheduled for 3-27-07.
Good Luck and please don't hesitate to contact me...I truly mean it!
Donna(colosn0w)

[DocSanae]

(((((((HUGS)))))))
That's a bugger to say the least, but as we say from time to time, everything that happens has a meaning. I am sure, if it weren't that you would be able to manage, your hubby wouldn't have gotten the assignment. I know it must be hard for you, but take it as a sign that you can do the things you really need to do by yourself now, even if it's painful.
Medically speaking, there is a point where you have to start pushing yourself.
So long as you don't overdo it, you'll be fine, so relax, and take stock of what you can do easily, without pain, what you can do with some pain, what you can do with quite a bit of pain, and what you absolutely can't do. You may be surprised that not much will fall into the last category.
For instance, take the garbage. Though it's going to take time and a few trips, maybe you can divide the garbage into small packs that you can carry using a small cart or something? Just a thought, here, mind you, but you're probably good at innovating, and while you can't do much physically, but I don't think it will be that painful for you to use your brains.

(((((((((HUGS))))))))))

[Kat]

Yikes!!! That sucks!!!
What Doc says makes sense about spliting things up.
Are there any people that you can ask for help...maybe they can take turns???
I had to have help getting in and out of bed too, till we pushed the bed close to a wall and I would put my feet on the wall to help hoist myself up. Same with the bathroom...I used the back of the toilet and inched up the right wall. I used a kitchen tong to pick clothes off the floor or reach for things.
I hope you can get settled on your own. Just don't push yourself beyond what you can stand. Who cares if your house isn't perfect or you look a little frumped? You will be feeling much better soon and will be able to take care of that stuff. Good luck and I'm thinking of you!