[pretty woman]

A week or so ago, I posted my support group is breaking up. There is a lot of change going on and it will take a lot of energy to restructure. ugh. We have some dedicated members; we said goodbye to our wonderful bariatric nurse who seemed to get the "screw" from the hospital. It was hard not to cry.
Yesterday, I went to the gym to meet my trainer and was told "he was let go." Fired? I am not a "Gym" kind of gal, let's face it; if I had been I wouldn't have needed WLS etc..etc. So "who do you want instead?" Hmmm.. THe first guy was really great for me. He was in great shape,near my age and made me work for it. I worked with him for 10? months. Gone! I have no idea who to pick. There are trainers there that...are "out of shape" not sure that is a good role model for me. There are also a lot of new trainers who are very young... 20? How much do they really know? ugh.
Yesterday, also my brother had to put my mom's cat to sleep. This was our last tie to my mom. THe cat had renal failure and try as he could my brother couldn't keep him going and comfortable. "Bubba" was a lover, he did his best to hang around as long as he could.
In the meantime, DH has a few things going on that is adding extra stress.
This would be a most perfect time for me to return to food as a comfort. Eat, EAT E A T ... if I hadn't had bypass I am sure I would be honkered down to a big plate of something right now. But, the pouch seems to be working and still giving me that full feeling. I am goingoff to the gym to work out (instead of eat) and try to focus on working out.
I guess the biggest downer is I just lost a few more pounds..so much closer to Onderland. And, when I look at the stats, I am STILL "OBESE"...Gosh I hate that word...whisper it, say it, shout it... I want a new word.
I hope I will feel better now "sharing" (dumping) all of this with you guys. Thanks for reading.

[jenny180]

OMG, I can see how frustrating that can be for you, too many things wrapped up in one big ball... I hope u get a decent trainer, unfortunately the one you had worked with is not longer there, its like u had created a bond and the bond was severed, you must feel hurt somehow. I sure hope you continue on the losing streak and no big plate of anything u will regret... go get ur work out on, and try to keep ur spirits high, lets know how u feeling as you venture thru the day, Have a good day

[Carol Jo B.]

Oh, PW, you certainly have a lot going on right now. I'm glad you shared with us and hope it made you feel better. Please let us know how things are going. Hugs!

[judst]

Awww PW ((hugs)), You've had a lot of losses to deal with and I'm so sorry for you having to go through so much stress. I want you to know how proud I am of you and all your accomplishments thus far. I just know that you'll be in onederland before you know it! I'm so glad that you are not hunkered down in your old habits to deal with all of this and am inspired by your strength and will to make the healthy choice and go to the gym.
I'm glad you shared and I want you to know you can call me anytime... you have my number. In the meantime friend, I'll be praying for you and sending hugs from afar.

[Mamakarne]

I'm so sorry. I'll include you in my prayers. Things will get better. I totally understand that you would have turned to food. That was my coping mechanism before surgery. It's so hard for me some days to not have it to turn to. I feel you pain.

[Tricia Igo]

wow, talk about having safety nets ripped out from under you!!! the support group was bad enough, but to lose a trusted trainer too?? I'm sorry to hear about your mom's cat too - that last tie to her being taken away is hard too.

I'm so proud of you for NOT turning to food! you and I were very close in our beginning stats - so I sort of look to you as a 'role model' - and I just want you to know that you're a great inspiration.

Is it possible to talk to a couple of the trainers before 'committing' to one??? that might help you to rebuild an important relationship.

I hope things with your DH settle down soon!!

[Nell]

Well, that's just too much going on at one time for anyone PW, but good for you not going back to those old habits. You are so close to onederland and will be there before ya know it!!! Keep up the good work, you are doing great!!!!

[MotoCO]

First off I am going to say that I hate that too! After all this weight lost and we are still in the "morbid obese" catagory" makes me mad. I think we should be in a different catagory now. Like "fluffy but healthy" for our BMI now....cause we have worked too dang hard to still be called "morbidly obese" and "obese". GRRRRRRR!!!!

Secondly, I am so sorry to hear about your mothers cat. Pets are such a blessing and I know how hard that is. But the love and life of those little furballs are always with us!

Finally, it seems that you have hit a rough patch with some of the assistance in your journey. But it is showing what you are made of! Strong stuff! Cause you are still going. You haven't given up and you haven'g EAT EAT EATEN! You are still losing and fighting for your group and for a new trainer. I bet the old you wouldn't have. You'd have had some icecream and some other stuff. But now, your life and health are too important! Look at you fight! I am proud of you. It gives me hope that I will continue to do the right things and make the good choices. You are a great role model.

Life is hard sometimes. I know we weren't promised a rose garden. But darn it...wouldn't it be nice to sit among the flowers for a while longer? You hang in there. Things will eventually even out.

I am going to "see" your personal trainer and "raise" you a treadmill walk- 40 minutes...starting now! (I am getting up to do that now) See? You inspire!

[nursesrock]

Dammit!! There, I said it for you Now that that's over with, I'll just say that I'm sorry this is happening........I'm not a religious person, but I do believe that there are some forces/gremlins/trolls or something that delight in causing us difficulties and try to get us to fall off the wagon! Well, you showed them, didn't you?? Things will get better and you will prevail. Onederland is just around the corner, sister! C'mon we're waiting for you!!

[AnnMarie]

UGH! How frustrating to say the least! I feel awful for you having the stress and I hope writing here has been good for the soul. Please know that I am thinking of you and your Mom. Loosing a pet is very difficult. I wish you well on your hunt for a trainer (good ones are hard to come by).
Be well.
Ann Marie