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06-24-2007, 06:27 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Floyd County Virginia
Posts: 9,445
Weight Statistics September 19th 2007 Start Date:
September 19th 2007 June 18,2012 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
363 lb Start Weight:
226 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
137 lb Weight Loss:
56 lb Lb Left to Lose:
37.741046832 % % Lost:
When I get there again Goal Date:
Body Mass Index52.0793877551 BMI Start:
32.4240816327 BMI Current:
24.3897959184 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
 |  Fun Pun for the day for the ladies... No offence to the fella's of the room
 Subject: Dictionary For Women Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.
Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.
Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner."
Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. Gotta get married in a church.
Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.
Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.
Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.
Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.
Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."
Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. Similar to a black hole in space-if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.
Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."
Lipstick (lip*stik) n. On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!
Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.
Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."
Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card
Again no offence to the fellas of the board. I thought this was a cute thing my hubby sent me on a bad day.
__________________ Remember Tough times never last Tough people do... This Ribbon is for our Lady Lisa and all the women that fight this ugly disease. RIP Jerry my friend
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06-24-2007, 06:52 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: NY
Posts: 10,174
Weight Statistics 4/19/2007 Surgery Date:
5' 9"
Height:
260 lb Start Weight:
152 lb Current Weight:
165 lb Goal Weight:
108 lb Weight Loss:
-13 lb Lb Left to Lose:
41.5384615385 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index38.3910943079 BMI Start:
22.4440243646 BMI Current:
24.36357908 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Right when i needed a giggle, i found this post. Thanks MsVickie!
__________________  KenyaR.  Lap RNY 4/19/07 | |
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06-25-2007, 12:37 AM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Super Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tokyo, Japan
Posts: 24,781
5' 5"
Height:
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06-29-2007, 10:08 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Resident of God's Garden since Jan '09, Missed on Terra, Victim to irresponsible DUI.
Posts: 271
Weight Statistics June 13 2007 Start Date:
January , 10, 2008 Surgery Date:
6' 5"
Height:
448 lb Start Weight:
238 lb Current Weight:
210 lb Goal Weight:
210 lb Weight Loss:
28 lb Lb Left to Lose:
46.875 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index53.119244392 BMI Start:
28.2195985832 BMI Current:
24.8996458087 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Oh ya ...very funny MsVickie... My wife read them and laughed her head off ! LOL
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06-30-2007, 05:38 AM
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#5 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Floyd County Virginia
Posts: 9,445
Weight Statistics September 19th 2007 Start Date:
September 19th 2007 June 18,2012 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
363 lb Start Weight:
226 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
137 lb Weight Loss:
56 lb Lb Left to Lose:
37.741046832 % % Lost:
When I get there again Goal Date:
Body Mass Index52.0793877551 BMI Start:
32.4240816327 BMI Current:
24.3897959184 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Im glad she got a laugh from it Jerry =)
__________________ Remember Tough times never last Tough people do... This Ribbon is for our Lady Lisa and all the women that fight this ugly disease. RIP Jerry my friend
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