[Fre]

I am undergoing the "hoop-jumping" required to be admitted to the gastric bypass program at Duke, in North Carolina. This morning I have two main things on my mind... 1) I keep hearing from medical professionals and folks in general about how RNY puts you into a state of malnutrition... how do I know who to believe? 2) Every blog I find, every message board I find... has yet to reveal to me the persons who have had RNY 6 or 7+ years ago... and I KNOW they are out there... I might find their blogs but they have not been updated in 3 or more years so.. I want to talk to someone who is more than 3 years out from their surgery and will be honest about how life is now. Any ideas?

thanks! Oh and this is my first post here!

best,

Fre

[Kenyar]

WELCOME!!!!!! hmm to be honest, yes it does cause a state of malnutrition which is why you will have to take vitamins and supplements and eat right for the rest of your life.
as for the LONG TIME post opers, I assume they disaapear because they are happy with life and are out living it. i have a friend who had this done 5 years ago. you have to literally nail her shoes to the floor just to have a conversation lol. i could be wrong. maybe its something else, but if it is i dont have a clue lol!

[DocSanae]

Welcome to the board, thank you for joining us.

On malnutrition, you have to keep in mind that gastric bypass surgery is designed to induce weight loss in part through malnutrition by bypassing the main part of the intestine that absorbs nutrients. So, it's mandatory that you keep up with the suggested pattern of eating, and with all the recommended supplements, and have your lab work done at least once a year, even if you are feeling on top of the world.

As for the long timers. The host of this site CraigT, though he isn't around much in person because his business is keeping him busy these days, marked his 10 year anniversary this past May. He is in overall good health, but he does keep up with his supplements and all. A couple of years back, it did turn out he had anemia, so he was put on iron pills, but since then, I haven't heard of anything else from him. As for the rest of his life, he's doing fine and happy. I won't say he's had some issues from time to time, I know of some of them, but then, they are the same as any person would have, whether pre-op, post-op, or non-op. In other words, by the time you are 5 years out, you've set a rhythm to your pattern that keeps you at a comfortable and happy level, and while the long timers are happy to answer any Qs from anyone, they themselves have learned to deal with life better on their own terms, and so can go flying around without touching base for a much longer time than those who are still new to this, and feeling their way around their body, and around living their new lives.

(((((((HUGS))))))) May your journey go well.

[BreeChick]

I had wls 5 yrs ago...for a long time after the 2nd year I didn't get online much I was WAY too busy living and working! Plus it seemed that a lot of the posties who were early out on the site I was on just didn't want to hear what I had to say..

their loss.

It's a really important thing to take into consideration the responsibility you have to have to staying healthy postop. We are NOT normal thin people who can go all day without eating and live on 1 tiny bit of food all day. That is a sure way to get very sick.

It's a wonderful opportunity to re-learn how to eat, what is best for your body and what supplements to have every single day the rest of your life! It's worth it, it's wonderful and it absolutely without fail

-----gives people life changing opportunities!------


Most of the time you don't hear from people after about that 2 -3 years time because...well ...this doesn't sound nice but... they just don't want to be reminded where they came from. They don't want to remember they used to be OBESE. That is NOT who they are anymore and they are living a life where some people or a lot of people may not have EVERY known them as hugely obese.

People in MY life. None of them know that I used to be hugely obese unless I've told them of this fact. Today I showed one of my female officers I dispatch for my before & afters..

"that's YOU??? no way!!" Then she hugged me hard and said I am SO PROUD of how far you've come. Wow..you know?

-bree

[Fre]

BreeChick,

What became of the folks who were your friends when you were obese? Why are they not in your life now? Or were you more or less alone?

Everytime I lose weight, I gain it back and then some. I feel certain that is /was the case with all of you here. So... after the surgery, after you heal, after you get to the point where you are comfortable with how you need to eat.... HOW do you stop yourself from going all day without eating small meals? I have a girl friend who already is too thin (post RNY) and she only eats at night after work. She'll take a stab at eating during the day some times, but she's so obsessed with not getting "fat again" that...

Incidentally, she is my best friend and was one of the three ladies featured on the Nightline special last month about transfer addictions post gastric bypass surgery.

I have six friends who have had RNY and three of them are gaining their weight back.

???

I KNOW it is up to me, but HOW do you manage? I do not eat to console myself, I do not binge eat, I do eat overly large portions sometimes but othertimes I get full before I even finish a whole quarter pounder <grin>

I eat when I'm bored and I'm bored a lot. I'm thinking/hoping that after I get this weight off, or a good deal of it, I can be more active, I will FEEL like being more active, so I won't be bored as often... am I on the right track?

I AM going to have to go to a psychologist because the psych team at the Duke bariatric group thinks I am in need of it. Perhaps I will get my questions answered there.

thanks again,

Fre

[Kenyar]

you cant rely on hopes and dreams. You need a plan or you will regain it. period. everyone is different. youre friends may have underlying issues, or not. its hard to tell off of one sentence lol!
i think some of us have discussed and agreed everyone needs therapy before, during, and after this surgery. there are things that need to be addressed in order to be sucessful and remain a success. they may not directly affect eating or the surgery per se, BUT you may find out you rely on food at times you didnt realize. its definitely difficult. this is not easy by any means. a lot of times people think just because they've lost all this weight they can act as if they can just live the life of a regular skinny person and that tends to sabotage the entire procedure. this is just a tool, only a beginning. the end is up to the patient.
i dont have experience and i am not far out by any means. but i am working on a plan for my future. thats the only way to at least TRY to never go back to where i was.

[yma]

Yes What you have to keep in mind is that this is a tool. You mentioned you have 3 friends that are gaining their weight back. Im sure that they are not following the rules of WLS anymore. This must be treated as a lifestyle change and it must be followed lifelong. For weightloss as well as for the vitamins so that you dont become deficient in anything. If you are doing what you are suppose too you should have nothing to worry about.

[Fre]

IF I could continue to do what I was supposed to, I wouldn't be here now. So I recognize that I have to WANT it bad enough to make those changes, permanently and that by having RNY, I am giving myself what I consider to be the last good chance to change my life. It is that important so making permanent changes are that important too. I'm afraid I will fail. So therapy is good. I'm afraid I cannot get organized enough to start and then be able to stay organized. I am a complete mess in my house.... no organization, cannot keep it clean and do not keep my kitchen up as I should. I will HAVE to in order to be able to prepare meals. Anyone else have a messy house, messy life, and messy kitchen and dealt with that? I mean REALLY messy...

Fre

[yma]

I couldnt do what I was suppose to b4 surgery. While My DH said that I could...I never could. I knew I didnt have it in me. I was very organized in everything b4 surgery so I cant relate there. But i was so organized b4 to the point where I did nothing to do or take care of myself ex. exersize, fast food, vitamins, etc.

After surgery I am still organized in my life but Ive learned to take care of myself 1st. Eat my alotted amount of protein, get my h20 in, take my vitamins, and exersize. I would have never done these things on my own b4 surgery. I dont know maybe they did something on my brain while I was under. LOL But I certainly have changed.

[Kenyar]

I'm the same way so i understand where you are coming from and I too have the same fears. MY LIFE WAS A COMPLETE WRECK before surgery. Single parent, scatterbrain, just left a long term relationship, moved to another state...disorganized to a T. MY car, my desk at work, my bedroom

But what I am saying is, this opportunity is like a clean slate. look at it this way. the honeymoon period which most of us refer to: (lets say the first year for arguements sake) thats the time for you to "clean up" by that I mean the house but more importantly YOU. because next to nothing you do "wrong" will fail you at that time. well not nothing, but thats the time you take to focus so to speak. therapy, organize your thoughts, your house, your life.

I have post its EVERYWHERE, i set reminders in my computer when to eat take supplements etc. Im VERY regimented now to the point where I've only JUST begun going out and breaking routine. (i've posted about that too)I'm not sure if its such a good thing, but it gets the house cleaned and laundry done every week..and i eat; which i was forgetting to do for a while lol! But I will share this with you: FOR ME disorganization was a symptom of something else deeper. You owe it to yourself to look into it. This procedure is life changing in ways you couldnt possibly imagine.

And Im not by any means placing blame or saying that if you could stick to what youre supposed to you wouldnt be here. I'm not saying that at all. I'm saying this is a wonderful opportunity with ups and downs and where as pre-op you have a choice to deviate; post op you really dont or you will get sick. be it cheating and eating something you arent supposed to, or skipping supplements, you will get sick. That was why i chose this route i think. i needed a system of punishments and rewards in order to regain control.

Sorry for such a long post. i just see so much of my pre-op self in what you've written.