 Feeling perky and blue
Isn't it weird how we learn, once we stop numbing out with food, that we can feel totally opposing feelings at the same time w/o being schizo or manic?
On one hand, I am thrilled because I finally broke down and bought a new desktop, got dsl and am now learning how to network with my laptop. I am part of the cyber world again! You should have seen how my kids suffered pc withdrawals for a month! No wls, more like cls.
On the other hand I'm blue. I have no SCUBA vacation this year after getting the kids certified and me refreshed, booking tickets and hotel in Turks and Caicos only to be cancelled because hubby opted to take the kids to Spore to vist Grandma, who always seems to be dieing, but never does. So this was my vacation...why not tour Austin? It's new to me. The kids 12 and 13 are constantly bickering, balking at miniscule chores, back talking, pushing the boundaries. They are student council, Talenented and Gifted program, International Baccelaureate kids with decent friends and personailies and all the obnoxiousness of teens. They could easily spiral out of control and lose it all if I don't put an end to it now. We just got satellite TV so hubby could watch his sports, and he is literally now out of the picutre, so no co-parenting there!
So far I've had to leave a luncheon halfway through, forego Blues on the Green, leave 5 min before curtain at theatre last night, cancel a sleepover and now I have 4 tickets to the theater tonight and I don't want to go and have a miserable time.
You know what? I'm not going to be isolated and on restriction and live in drudgery because other people are acting out (I've done my own fair share, that's true) If I have to get a sitter so I can reward my hard daily efforts with a non-food or purchase reward, so be it.
I say that now, but admit I broke down last night after 9pm and sucked on hard candy, thereby eradicating any progress I had made all day long getting back on track (I'm at the top of my comfort zone, which is NOT comfortable!) There has to be a better way. I'll think on it. Talk about the blind leading the blind!
Oh well, sigh. Today is a new day. And I am basically very happy. Seems like a good day to duck out for a couple of hours and go to the gym. Treat myself well, eat healthfully. Then I can spend the rest of the day learning about Linksys and Netgear routers. Oh goody!
Vicki
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So long as you are putting your best foot forward, then, 
Linear Mode
