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01-15-2008, 07:03 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Seasoned Veteran Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Mount Vernon, NY
Posts: 7,905
Weight Statistics all my life Start Date:
4/19/2007 Surgery Date:
5' 9"
Height:
260 lb Start Weight:
149 lb Current Weight:
160 lb Goal Weight:
111 lb Weight Loss:
-11 lb Lb Left to Lose:
42.6923076923 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index 38.3910943079 BMI Start:
22.0010501995 BMI Current:
23.6252888049 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass    |  when do you tell?
this is inspired by my other post. im going on a date on thursday with a guy from work. he doesnt know i used to be heavy. in fact, we work on opposite sides of the building. im sure he had seen me here or there but never really said anything. i never caught him looking at me or anything like that. anyway, it became apparent that there was interest. he sent me an email today, and complimented my new haircut lol. i never thought he paid me any attention when passing him by but he noticed.  anyhow, fastforward to my question. do i have this conversation with him, possibly on the date, about the surgery? he didnt know i was big before, at least i assume. when he was hired i was already down about 40 or 50 lbs and didnt seem him regularly to begin with. and im not trying to hide it but at the same time i dont want to scare him away with the list of things i cant do ( drink, eat sugar  etc) i could maybe wait and see if it comes up in conversation? i mean what are the chances that he did notice me when i was bigger but just didnt say anything? if thats the case then he's gonna know i lost a bunch of weight...ugh! WHAT DO I DO?
__________________ Anything worth having is worth working for!   KenyaR.  Lap RNY 4/19/07 |
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01-15-2008, 07:13 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Seasoned Veteran  Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Buffalo, NY
Posts: 2,444
Weight Statistics 12-19-07 Start Date:
1-29-08 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
286 lb Start Weight:
164 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
122 lb Weight Loss:
14 lb Lb Left to Lose:
42.6573426573 % % Lost:
eventually Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 50.6570924666 BMI Start:
29.0481229529 BMI Current:
26.5684051398 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass | 
Well, I responded to the last post, but I'll put it here too. I was thinking that you might have to say something pretty soon because if you're going to eat he's gonna notice that you don't eat like a normal woman (eating small amts, slowly, few carbs, no sugar/alcohol, etc...). And maybe he has noticed you more than you thought if he noticed your hair! Plus mabe he's heard people talking, saying how great you look, etc... Maybe he'll make it easy and bring it up himself!! I guess I'm officially voting for telling soon. But I haven't been there myself (no surgery yet!), but that's what I'd do. I hope this helps!
__________________ Kelly  5'3"    |
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01-15-2008, 07:43 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Guru In Training  Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cheektowaga, New York
Posts: 335
Weight Statistics November7,2007 Start Date:
MARCH 11,2008 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
289 lb Start Weight:
181 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
108 lb Weight Loss:
31 lb Lb Left to Lose:
37.3702422145 % % Lost:
1 yr from surgery Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 46.6407254362 BMI Start:
29.2109733701 BMI Current:
24.2079889807 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
Kenya i just posted on you other post . from my experience. maybe he did notice but didn't know how to approach you . just wait and see if it comes up if so and you feel comfortable tell him if not just say you are on a diet and there are somethings you can't have tell him later once you get to know him that doesn't have to be known right now.just go with the flow so to speak . Don't scare him off yet . i;m quite sure he will tell you if he has noticed you before now.
__________________  LETS WEAR BLACK BECAUSE IT'S SEXY, NOT SLIMMING [SIGPIC] POOPOO**I LOST 30 LBS. BEFORE SURGERY LEAVING ME AT 258LBS. PRIOR TO SURGERY** to see pictures go to myspace.com/1reesechick  |
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01-15-2008, 07:59 PM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Seasoned Veteran Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 2,040
Blog Entries: 8 Weight Statistics July 10, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
271 lb Start Weight:
143 lb Current Weight:
145 lb Goal Weight:
128 lb Weight Loss:
-2 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.2324723247 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index 43.7357667585 BMI Start:
23.0782828283 BMI Current:
23.4010560147 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass | Interesting topic ~ I dont think it should be the first thing you tell him but you'll probably find a natural time to just mention it. I'd keep it casual and light, if he pursues the conversation then just follow his lead.
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01-15-2008, 08:19 PM
| #5 (permalink) |
| Guru In Training  Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: pittsburgh, pa
Posts: 305
Weight Statistics 06/04/2007 Start Date:
08/14/2007 Surgery Date:
5' 9"
Height:
379 lb Start Weight:
245 lb Current Weight:
200 lb Goal Weight:
134 lb Weight Loss:
45 lb Lb Left to Lose:
35.3562005277 % % Lost:
asap!!! Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 55.9624028565 BMI Start:
36.1762234825 BMI Current:
29.5316110061 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
I agree with clancy, follow his lead, life shouldnt be about the "before" it should be about the "now" and beyond
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01-15-2008, 08:52 PM
| #6 (permalink) |
| Big Loser  Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Campbell River, BC
Posts: 171
Weight Statistics December 4 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 7"
Height:
308 lb Start Weight:
163 lb Current Weight:
165 lb Goal Weight:
145 lb Weight Loss:
-2 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.0779220779 % % Lost:
May 2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 48.2343506349 BMI Start:
25.5266206282 BMI Current:
25.8398306973 BMI Goal:
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I would not tell him until I knew the relationship was going somewhere. I am not big on people who disclose information easily. Probably because I am so private. That is why I love this site because I can disclose all I want because no one really knows me in my every day life. There is something to be said for a little mystery. I believe in honesty, but if it does not come up why tell. Your surgery does not define who you are, it was a tool to help you achieve a healthier you. Lots of people do not drink or eat sugar as a personal choice. I would wait it out, see if he is worth telling and sharing your private things with. It takes time to make a good assessment. This is just my vote. I am sure you will do what feels right for you. |
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01-15-2008, 08:57 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| WLS Master Guru  Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cottondale Alabama
Posts: 581
Weight Statistics 12-19-07 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
228 lb Start Weight:
140 lb Current Weight:
140 lb Goal Weight:
88 lb Weight Loss:
38.5964912281 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index 40.3839758125 BMI Start:
24.7971781305 BMI Current:
24.7971781305 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
I agree that you shouldn't tell him right away. Enjoy the date and have a nice time and if it comes up then approach it.
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01-15-2008, 09:06 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Seasoned Veteran  Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: coarsegold california
Posts: 1,540
Weight Statistics 8/23/07 Start Date:
8/22/07 Surgery Date:
5' 7"
Height:
315 lb Start Weight:
192 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
123 lb Weight Loss:
22 lb Lb Left to Lose:
39.0476190476 % % Lost:
I have no idea Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 49.3305858766 BMI Start:
30.0681666295 BMI Current:
26.6228558699 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
Most men cant help but comment on a woman who dosn't eat enough, if you guys are going to eat somewhere it will probably come up. If not then let it go until the time presents itself.
__________________   traci  |
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01-15-2008, 09:09 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| WLS Guru  Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: New Zealand
Posts: 463
Blog Entries: 2 Weight Statistics 10/27/07 Start Date:
11 March 08 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
239 lb Start Weight:
141 lb Current Weight:
143 lb Goal Weight:
98 lb Weight Loss:
-2 lb Lb Left to Lose:
41.0041841004 % % Lost:
12/25/08 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index 42.3323255228 BMI Start:
24.9743008314 BMI Current:
25.3285462333 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
This is what I would do: If he noticed my peculiar eating habits, and looked like he wanted to say something, but was too polite, I would just say, 'I have some issues with digestion, so have to be very careful with what I eat and how much I eat/drink etc'... its true...just not the Whole truth.. then if the relationship becomes something special, then you might find your way to tell him the whole story.Good luck!!! Knock his socks off!!!
__________________ Leelee Your Attitude determines Your Altitude   239lbs - lost 22lbs pre-op= 218lbs day of surgery.   |
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01-15-2008, 09:11 PM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Seasoned Veteran Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Mount Vernon, NY
Posts: 7,905
Weight Statistics all my life Start Date:
4/19/2007 Surgery Date:
5' 9"
Height:
260 lb Start Weight:
149 lb Current Weight:
160 lb Goal Weight:
111 lb Weight Loss:
-11 lb Lb Left to Lose:
42.6923076923 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index 38.3910943079 BMI Start:
22.0010501995 BMI Current:
23.6252888049 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss Method Roux en Y Gastric Bypass |
ok so if it comes up its ok to tell. but dont offer it just yet? lol. gotcha THANKS. i am a social moron so i dont even know how to approach conversation much less this topic specifically. Thanks again. I love you all like sisters!
__________________ Anything worth having is worth working for! KenyaR. Lap RNY 4/19/07 |
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5'3"
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