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04-10-2008, 04:27 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: May 2007 Location: minnesota
Posts: 5,595
Weight Statistics july 21, 2007 Start Date:
august 17, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
339 lb Start Weight:
177 lb Current Weight:
160 lb Goal Weight:
162 lb Weight Loss:
17 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.7876106195 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index54.7100550964 BMI Start:
28.5654269972 BMI Current:
25.8218549128 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
 |  divorce
ok so some of you know about my marraige from posts in the past, well i finally told my hubby yesterday that i want a divorce and it was quite the day..anger, yelling, swearing then im sorry i will do whatever it takes...blah blah blah...i know i am at the point in my life where i want to start over but here is my problem..i have such a soft heart and have a very hard time with hurting anyone even if it means that i will be unhappy..i have come to terms with the fact that i am a caretaker. i have spent so many years making everyone els happy and staying in a marraige because of everyone els...i hope i can stay strong and not cave...i feel like it is hopeless!!!
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04-10-2008, 04:36 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: North West, NJ
Posts: 2,707
Weight Statistics 1/14/2008 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
330 lb Start Weight:
235 lb Current Weight:
200 lb Goal Weight:
95 lb Weight Loss:
35 lb Lb Left to Lose:
28.7878787879 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index47.3448979592 BMI Start:
33.7153061224 BMI Current:
28.693877551 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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You are in a tough position - no advice sweetheart, I don't know you or your life well enough - all I can say is be true to your heart. Major (((HUGS))) sent your way.
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04-10-2008, 04:51 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: North Dakota
Posts: 204
Weight Statistics 9-21-07 Start Date:
September 21st 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 2"
Height:
300 lb Start Weight:
195 lb Current Weight:
175 lb Goal Weight:
105 lb Weight Loss:
20 lb Lb Left to Lose:
35 % % Lost:
whatever happens! Goal Date:
Body Mass Index54.8647242456 BMI Start:
35.6620707596 BMI Current:
32.0044224766 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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I am not sure what to say but know that we are all here for you and I will keep you in my thoughts!
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04-10-2008, 05:11 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Palm Coast, Florida
Posts: 278
Weight Statistics May 5, 2008 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
307 lb Start Weight:
181 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
126 lb Weight Loss:
31 lb Lb Left to Lose:
41.0423452769 % % Lost:
June 2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index49.5456841139 BMI Start:
29.2109733701 BMI Current:
24.2079889807 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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I feel for you. I'm sort of in the same situation. I don't know if your a christian or not but my faith has gotten me through alot. I'm not for divorce but sometimes it's the only way when there's not change on both sides. Good luck. I'll be praying for you. 
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04-10-2008, 05:26 PM
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#5 (permalink)
| | WLS Mentor
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,292
Weight Statistics 10/27/07 Start Date:
11 March 08 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
239 lb Start Weight:
134 lb Current Weight:
144 lb Goal Weight:
105 lb Weight Loss:
-10 lb Lb Left to Lose:
43.9330543933 % % Lost:
12/25/08 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index42.3323255228 BMI Start:
23.7344419249 BMI Current:
25.5056689342 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeMarie  You are in a tough position - no advice sweetheart, I don't know you or your life well enough - all I can say is be true to your heart. Major (((HUGS))) sent your way. | Same from me 
Take care and be true to your heart.
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04-10-2008, 05:42 PM
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#6 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Troy,ny
Posts: 2,799
Weight Statistics Since birth:) Start Date:
August 5, 2009 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
319 lb Start Weight:
189 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
130 lb Weight Loss:
39 lb Lb Left to Lose:
40.7523510972 % % Lost:
sometime in 2010 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index51.4823232323 BMI Start:
30.5020661157 BMI Current:
24.2079889807 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Oh honey, I am sorry to here you are having a tough time. I don't know the situation between you and your husband to offer any specific advice. I can relate though because I am in a bad marriage myself. Some days I feel as if the world is caving in on me. Be strong, true to yourself and heart. If you believe in a higher being than by all means turn to HIM. He would never give us anything more than we can handle. ((((HUGS))))
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04-10-2008, 06:36 PM
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#7 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: WADING RIVER (Long Island), NY
Posts: 5,122
Weight Statistics 7/16/07 Start Date:
7/16/07 Surgery Date:
4' 11"
Height:
230 lb Start Weight:
130 lb Current Weight:
115 lb Goal Weight:
100 lb Weight Loss:
15 lb Lb Left to Lose:
43.4782608696 % % Lost:
12/31/08 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index46.4492961793 BMI Start:
26.2539500144 BMI Current:
23.2246480896 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Oh Honey Im So Sorry To Hear Of Your Situation. But God You Sound So Much Like Me When It Comes To Being A Caretaker And Looking At Everyone Elses Needs But Your Own. BUT IM AM REALLY GETTING BETTER WITH THAT!!!
Of Course I Dont Know The Whole Situation But All I Can Tell You Is Really Take Your Time And Think About Everything And Think About What Will Make You Happy Because This Is About You. We Only Live Once And If You Dont Make Yourself Happy In This Life You Will Never Get A Second Chance.
Im Thinking About You And Will Pray For You!!!!!!! If You Ever Need A Friend Please Email Me.
Hugs 
__________________ 230 lbs 7/2007 & 130 lbs 2/2009    | |
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04-10-2008, 06:36 PM
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#8 (permalink)
| | Super Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tokyo, Japan
Posts: 24,786
5' 5"
Height:
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((((((HUGS)))))))
Keep in mind, if you can't be happy with yourself and love yourself, you won't be able to make others truly happy, and have others love you truly.
Also, if their Mom is unhappy, then it's going to affect the kids in one way or another.
You also have a right to be happy.
Tying marriage counseling is an option, if you are willing. That may enable both of you to see what the problems are, and either give you tools to correct them, or give you the final sprigboard to go your respective ways. If your husband makes you feel that maybe you should stay, then making that a condition might help, not that you'll stay, but make counseling a condition for you two to try to see if you can work things out. If your husband sees through counseling that it won't, then for one, you will know that you gave it a try, and for two, your husband will know that it won't work, and it's better for both of you, and your children to start differnt lives.
((((((((HUGS)))))))) I hope both you and your husband can make the happiness the respective you deserve.
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04-10-2008, 06:50 PM
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#9 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Floyd County Virginia
Posts: 9,445
Weight Statistics September 19th 2007 Start Date:
September 19th 2007 June 18,2012 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
363 lb Start Weight:
226 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
137 lb Weight Loss:
56 lb Lb Left to Lose:
37.741046832 % % Lost:
When I get there again Goal Date:
Body Mass Index52.0793877551 BMI Start:
32.4240816327 BMI Current:
24.3897959184 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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You have to make the right decison for yourself honey. Good luck with it all.
__________________ Remember Tough times never last Tough people do... This Ribbon is for our Lady Lisa and all the women that fight this ugly disease. RIP Jerry my friend
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04-10-2008, 07:06 PM
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#10 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: May 2007 Location: minnesota
Posts: 5,595
Weight Statistics july 21, 2007 Start Date:
august 17, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
339 lb Start Weight:
177 lb Current Weight:
160 lb Goal Weight:
162 lb Weight Loss:
17 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.7876106195 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index54.7100550964 BMI Start:
28.5654269972 BMI Current:
25.8218549128 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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thanks for all the encouraging words..it is nice to know i can turn to everyone on this site when i am having a hard time....(((HUGS))) to all!!
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