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06-04-2008, 07:28 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | Big Loser
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Texas
Posts: 153
Weight Statistics My whole life Start Date:
10/23/2008 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
338 lb Start Weight:
193 lb Current Weight:
204 lb Goal Weight:
145 lb Weight Loss:
-11 lb Lb Left to Lose:
42.899408284 % % Lost:
11/12/2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index54.5486685032 BMI Start:
31.1476124885 BMI Current:
32.9228650138 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
 |  Has anyone had this happen with a friend?
Let me set the scene. I've been working at my job for about a year and a half. Have become friends with a person there who is nearly my size. She is a very active person and has always told me the different things that her and her family do.
When I was just doing the investigation for the WLS, she was right there going "yea - good job. Know someone who had it done and it was the best thing that he ever did".
Now that she knows that I am serious and just waiting on my sleep study to get a surgical date - her whole attitude has changed. Now she is coming in and telling us that she has done 250 squats and 100 push ups, etc. She is always giving me a run down of what she eats and is trying to be the food authority on what is good for you and what isn't good for you, etc. You get the point.
Now I know when I went for my psych evaluation, he did tell me to be prepared for this to happen because after I have the surgery and really start losing, she is going to be the heaviest in the office so she feels threatened.
I'm just curious if anyone else experienced this type of thing with a friend or family member.
Thanks!
Ella
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06-04-2008, 07:59 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | Super Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tokyo, Japan
Posts: 24,786
5' 5"
Height:
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It's quite common, I'm afraid. Everyone has had to deal with at least a few persons like that somewhere during their journey, whether pre or post op.
Check out the threads in Family and Loved Ones (where I am moving this, incidentally) and you will see lots of threads and posts echoing your situation.
Always remember, you are doing this for your own health, and the decision is yours to make. If somebody else has a problem with that, it's their problem, not yours, so don't be concerened about what they think, just do what YOU need to do.
((((((HUGS)))))) May your journey go well.
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06-04-2008, 08:10 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Cub Reporter
Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 86
Weight Statistics Nov 9th 2007 Start Date:
January 9th 2008 Surgery Date:
5' 4"
Height:
253 lb Start Weight:
175 lb Current Weight:
160 lb Goal Weight:
78 lb Weight Loss:
15 lb Lb Left to Lose:
30.8300395257 % % Lost:
january 2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index43.4226074219 BMI Start:
30.0354003906 BMI Current:
27.4609375 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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my best friend of 25 yrs and i were always the same size. she did everything to try and talk me out of getting the surgery done. now we speak MAYBE once every 2 weeks where as before we spoke everyday. when we do get together i can tell she is upset with me. i almost feel guilty that i had this done and have lost so much weight and left her still heavy. maybe she will come around eventually. i think i would feel jealous too if she were the one losing weight and i was the heavy one. like doc said its HER problem... hope things get better for you!!
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06-05-2008, 01:18 AM
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#4 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: AZ
Posts: 2,178
Weight Statistics January 1, 2008 Start Date:
January 11, 2008 Surgery Date:
5' 7"
Height:
339 lb Start Weight:
145 lb Current Weight:
149 lb Goal Weight:
194 lb Weight Loss:
-4 lb Lb Left to Lose:
57.2271386431 % % Lost:
July 4, 2009 FIREWORKS, BABY! Goal Date:
Body Mass Index53.0891067053 BMI Start:
22.7077300067 BMI Current:
23.3341501448 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Yep- it really can be hard for others around you. Maybe she feels like she should prove to you she is being healthy since you are choosing to be healthy through surgery. I would try to talk to her and see how she really feels- you may be surprised good or bad at what she has to say. (Nearly lost my friend of 20+ years after her reaction to my surgery! Later found out she was hurt I hadn't told her earlier, not that she didn't approve of my choice)
__________________  KB
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06-05-2008, 02:49 AM
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#5 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Jacksonville, Florida
Posts: 5,162
Weight Statistics July 21, 2007 Start Date:
August 6, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
287 lb Start Weight:
151 lb Current Weight:
140 lb Goal Weight:
136 lb Weight Loss:
11 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.3867595819 % % Lost:
January 1, 2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index50.8342151675 BMI Start:
26.7455278408 BMI Current:
24.7971781305 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Wow, I havent seen this side yet. Sorry...but good luck to you.
__________________ Kim Tummy Tuck 2-17-09 Breast & Arm Lift 4-22-10 Breast Implants 5-11-11 http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1408442896  | |
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06-05-2008, 04:16 AM
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#6 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: North Texas
Posts: 5,236
Weight Statistics I've lost/gained my whole life!!! Start Date:
Aug 1, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 8"
Height:
280 lb Start Weight:
154 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
126 lb Weight Loss:
4 lb Lb Left to Lose:
45 % % Lost:
Summer 2008 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index42.5692041522 BMI Start:
23.4130622837 BMI Current:
22.8049307958 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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very common....but you have to look out for you and let her deal with her own demons....
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06-05-2008, 05:21 AM
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#7 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: NYC the best place in the world to live!
Posts: 3,453
Weight Statistics Halloween 2005 Start Date:
4' 11"
Height:
212 lb Start Weight:
127 lb Current Weight:
130 lb Goal Weight:
85 lb Weight Loss:
-3 lb Lb Left to Lose:
40.0943396226 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index42.8141338696 BMI Start:
25.6480896294 BMI Current:
26.2539500144 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Has happend and she prob wont be the last to try to make you feel that way. This surgery is for you and others can say what they want ...in the end you have to be happy with your decision. I know i Am....Stick around positive people through your journey. We are here for you.
__________________ LisaMarie  | |
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06-05-2008, 06:01 AM
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#8 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Davenport, IA
Posts: 1,848
Weight Statistics 12/28/06 Start Date:
May 14, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 5"
Height:
253 lb Start Weight:
191 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
62 lb Weight Loss:
41 lb Lb Left to Lose:
24.5059288538 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index42.0968047337 BMI Start:
31.780591716 BMI Current:
24.9585798817 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Yep, suddenly all the overweight people in the office feel the need to tell you how great they are doing. (And you know that they really aren't) It is just their reaction to knowing they won't have you in their "Club" anymore.
__________________ Jeanne   | |
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06-05-2008, 07:26 AM
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#9 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Floyd County Virginia
Posts: 9,445
Weight Statistics September 19th 2007 Start Date:
September 19th 2007 June 18,2012 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
363 lb Start Weight:
226 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
137 lb Weight Loss:
56 lb Lb Left to Lose:
37.741046832 % % Lost:
When I get there again Goal Date:
Body Mass Index52.0793877551 BMI Start:
32.4240816327 BMI Current:
24.3897959184 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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OH YES!!! LOL. Encourage her to do well on her plan.........and let her know you will be following your surgeons. It can be delt with easily most of the time.
__________________ Remember Tough times never last Tough people do... This Ribbon is for our Lady Lisa and all the women that fight this ugly disease. RIP Jerry my friend
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06-05-2008, 08:14 AM
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#10 (permalink)
| | WLS Master Guru
Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cottondale Alabama
Posts: 581
Weight Statistics 12-19-07 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
228 lb Start Weight:
135 lb Current Weight:
140 lb Goal Weight:
93 lb Weight Loss:
-5 lb Lb Left to Lose:
40.7894736842 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index40.3839758125 BMI Start:
23.9115646259 BMI Current:
24.7971781305 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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There are only 4 of us ladies in the office here and I was the heaviest. Now I am next to the smallest.  The office manager has always fought her weight and I totally identify with her. She was unsure of my decision when I first announced my plans. But since then she has tried to get approved for the lap-band and been denied. The problem is she eats all day long. We all know that eating less will help us to lose which is why we chose a drastic approach to get healthy. Now she just doesn't even acknowledge my weight loss at all.
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