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07-25-2008, 08:47 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 270
Weight Statistics
5' 6"
Height:
309 lb Start Weight:
141 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
168 lb Weight Loss:
-29 lb Lb Left to Lose:
54.3689320388 % % Lost:
12/01/09 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index49.8684573003 BMI Start:
22.7555096419 BMI Current:
27.4357208448 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
 |  Hmm how do I put this, selfish?
The only thing my mom could say is, 'I guess your husband and I will have to pick up the pieces after surgery, do really think this is kind to us?' 
I didn't know what to say and so I didn't. My mom is a very supportive person (well when it is on her terms), but I thought she would be excited. After all she has had me on diets since before my pre-teens. She is always hounding me about what I eat and if I am exercising.
I know I should tell her how much it hurt me ... I just have to get up the courage.
I actually was thinking she was going to say, 'you're finally doing something.' Though I have been trying all my life to get healthy.
I wish family and other would accept me like my husband does. 
__________________ 
Last edited by OMCV; 07-25-2008 at 09:03 PM.
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07-25-2008, 09:08 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 270
Weight Statistics
5' 6"
Height:
309 lb Start Weight:
141 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
168 lb Weight Loss:
-29 lb Lb Left to Lose:
54.3689320388 % % Lost:
12/01/09 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index49.8684573003 BMI Start:
22.7555096419 BMI Current:
27.4357208448 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Ok maybe I am over reacting ... I know I will have to rely on someone to help with the kids, etc. I just thought that she would be willing to do so?!?! Maybe I am expecting too much.
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07-25-2008, 09:19 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Super Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tokyo, Japan
Posts: 24,786
5' 5"
Height:
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Awww (((((HUGS))))
Ages and ages ago. When I told my parents they were going to be grandparents, one of the first things my mother said (after the congratulations, mind you) was, "Don't expect me to baby sit at your beck and call just because she's our grandchild 
Mothers do have their own lives even if they are our Moms.
Why don't you give her a list of what exactly you would like for her to help you out with, to give her a handle on how much she actually needs to do. That may work better than just a geneal request for help.
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07-25-2008, 09:21 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 270
Weight Statistics
5' 6"
Height:
309 lb Start Weight:
141 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
168 lb Weight Loss:
-29 lb Lb Left to Lose:
54.3689320388 % % Lost:
12/01/09 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index49.8684573003 BMI Start:
22.7555096419 BMI Current:
27.4357208448 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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As always DOC ... thank you for cheering me up!!!!
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07-25-2008, 10:10 PM
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#5 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: North West, NJ
Posts: 2,707
Weight Statistics 1/14/2008 Surgery Date:
5' 10"
Height:
330 lb Start Weight:
235 lb Current Weight:
200 lb Goal Weight:
95 lb Weight Loss:
35 lb Lb Left to Lose:
28.7878787879 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index47.3448979592 BMI Start:
33.7153061224 BMI Current:
28.693877551 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Books and books and books written on mother daughter relationships...mine said "Can't you just diet?" Helloooooo....and thank God I am blessed with such a wonderful hubby - didn't even ask my mother to help with anything (although I don't have children, so easier for me...but still). We probably shouldn't get started on the mother stories, I'm sure many of us could write our own book...me first!
Don't let any one put a damper on your journey now - you've come too far! Is it worth even getting into - can you let it go - why waste the precious time??? Good luck - you are going to be gorgeous! Healthy too!
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07-25-2008, 10:52 PM
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#6 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: North Texas
Posts: 5,236
Weight Statistics I've lost/gained my whole life!!! Start Date:
Aug 1, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 8"
Height:
280 lb Start Weight:
154 lb Current Weight:
150 lb Goal Weight:
126 lb Weight Loss:
4 lb Lb Left to Lose:
45 % % Lost:
Summer 2008 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index42.5692041522 BMI Start:
23.4130622837 BMI Current:
22.8049307958 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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I'm confused...what pieces?
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07-25-2008, 10:53 PM
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#7 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: No. Los Angeles County, CA
Posts: 2,849
Weight Statistics 4.29.08 RNY Surgery Date:
5' 8"
Height:
301 lb Start Weight:
168 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
133 lb Weight Loss:
-2 lb Lb Left to Lose:
44.1860465116 % % Lost:
Body Mass Index45.7618944637 BMI Start:
25.5415224913 BMI Current:
25.8455882353 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Heh. Moms....shesh.
When I was 17 or so, Mom was harrassing me, as usual, about my weight and eating...I said, "What about you? You are not skinny!"
Her reply..."I got my man, sister."
sigh.
Anyway, I was back in the kitchen within a week post op, and although I was not picking up babies, I was doing VERY light housework from week one to three and I was at the gym at 5 weeks, per surgeon's approval.
I was out playing basketball tonight with DD, 3 months out.
Sooo, you won't be out of commission very long at all!
__________________
Judijo 
"Burning out this fuse out here alone" Surgery 4.29.08
11-29-08: Down 90 lbs. Total cholesterol is under 200 for the first time in my adult life!
1.11.09: 100 lbs down! Century Club! WHOO HOO! 
7.10.09 GOL! GOL! GOLGOLGOLGOLGOL! GGGGOOOOLLL!
1.10.10 Still at goal.
2.21.12 up a bit. Back on track, I hope. 
310/176/<164
Starting weight: beginning of nutrition classes, August, 2007 | |
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07-26-2008, 12:16 AM
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#8 (permalink)
| | Guru In Training
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 270
Weight Statistics
5' 6"
Height:
309 lb Start Weight:
141 lb Current Weight:
170 lb Goal Weight:
168 lb Weight Loss:
-29 lb Lb Left to Lose:
54.3689320388 % % Lost:
12/01/09 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index49.8684573003 BMI Start:
22.7555096419 BMI Current:
27.4357208448 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trulykath  I'm confused...what pieces? | Taking care of the house, kids and me ... post-op.
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07-26-2008, 12:48 AM
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#9 (permalink)
| | Big Loser
Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: California
Posts: 180
Weight Statistics 6/1/07 Start Date:
6/1/07 Surgery Date:
5' 6"
Height:
242 lb Start Weight:
165 lb Current Weight:
145 lb Goal Weight:
77 lb Weight Loss:
20 lb Lb Left to Lose:
31.8181818182 % % Lost:
12/31/08 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index39.0555555556 BMI Start:
26.6287878788 BMI Current:
23.4010560147 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Support is important after surgery, especially if you have young ones. If she and hubby is your main help, i would ask if she could possibly help a day or two right after surgery. i hope it works out for you.
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07-26-2008, 04:48 AM
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#10 (permalink)
| | Seasoned Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Jacksonville, Florida
Posts: 5,162
Weight Statistics July 21, 2007 Start Date:
August 6, 2007 Surgery Date:
5' 3"
Height:
287 lb Start Weight:
151 lb Current Weight:
140 lb Goal Weight:
136 lb Weight Loss:
11 lb Lb Left to Lose:
47.3867595819 % % Lost:
January 1, 2009 Goal Date:
Body Mass Index50.8342151675 BMI Start:
26.7455278408 BMI Current:
24.7971781305 BMI Goal:
Weight Loss MethodRoux en Y Gastric Bypass
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Maybe its just me, but I would def let her know that what she said was NOT acceptable! My mom has ways of saying things that come out all wrong, and if you call her on it, she actually gets the right words out. Maybe that is all the comment was? Whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck.
__________________ Kim Tummy Tuck 2-17-09 Breast & Arm Lift 4-22-10 Breast Implants 5-11-11 http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1408442896  | |
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