[Perfesser]

Here in the United States, November is the month when we celebrate our Thanksgiving holiday. At this time, we often gather for a feast of family, gluttony and giving thanks for the things for which we are grateful. We should be beyond the gluttony by now, but 2 out 3 ain't bad!

Why stop at one day?

Most of us here I believe share our homes and our hearts with another person of adult responsibility. Husband, wife, significant other, partner, roommate, whatever the label, this person is a part of our life. To reduce awkwardness of gender labeling, I’ll refer to him or her by that delightful British term “mate”, which can mean a friend of either sex or something much stronger.

I challenge each of you to find things your mate does for you that maybe you often take for granted. Then, each day from now until the end of this month, thank that person for these things. Do not tell your mate why you are doing this!! If pressed, say that this is Thanksgiving, and you decided to give thanks where it’s due. Don’t explain any further than this. No one likes to be thought of as homework!!

The other day, as an example, I thanked Peanut for making sure that I always have a drawer full of fresh, folded underwear. After the startled look, she said you’re welcome and wandered off, but she was smiling for several hours after. This is the kind of thing we can each do for our mate. Be creative. The real challenge comes after the easy things are used!

The benefits of doing this are several. It will underscore to you what your mate actually does for you without being asked. Even if you have to think hard and dig deep, you can find something every day! It will make your mate feel really good. It may give your mate the desire to reciprocate, and start thanking you for what you do. It will almost assuredly strengthen and deepen your relationship, and increase domestic harmony, and which of us doesn’t want that! Don’t keep score though.

The challenge may get you started, but only love can carry you through.

As the month goes on and Thanksgiving comes and goes, return to this thread often and let us know any experiences you choose to share.

Let’s show our mates that we care enough to make Thanksgiving a season of thanks giving!! Aren't they worth it?


CT

[ksummer19]

I love this and will start tomorrow. I am also going to include my daughter who lives with me. I've never had a hard time saying thank you for something and love this daily challenge.

BTW Perfesser Happy Veterans day.

[not quite Barbie]

Good thought Vickie, I'm going to expand on it.

Thank you to all you Veterns who gave so much for us. To the active duty military who are putting themselves in harm's way, and to the spouses and family members who rarely get recognition for all they endure while their loved one is serving our country.

[YourWLBuddy]

My husband is in afghanistan. I'll be spending both thanksgiving and Christmas alone but as long as he is okay I don't care.

[RC59105]

Its a grand idea, I tell my family every single day how much I love them, but it would be nice to point out some of the little things about them I am thankful for instead of just saying "I love you" all of the time....
Its nice to be appreciated and know that you are loved and giving back is the best way I know how.

[luvRdogs]

What a wonderful idea! I'm up for the challenge.

I love how my DH always makes sure that my car has the oil checked, changed, tires are at the correct pressure and it's always reliable for me to drive my 2 hour commute each day.. All I have to do is get in it and drive...well, I guess I DO have to put gas in it.

I guess I'll have to thank him more often for all the things he does. Like buy groceries, cook, etc.

I think I'll start now instead of tomorrow!


Hugs to ya'll!

salli lou

[Perfesser]

We never could have kids, and our nearest family is 1200 miles and a few state lines away, so we're alone here at Thanksgiving. Which is why we started a new tradition a few years back where I invite a bunch of international students to share a typical American Thanksgiving feast with us.

I'll do a big turkey (18+ pounds) and we make all the trimmings, but in a WLS-compliant way, so we can eat it too. Okay, so we go real light on the mashed potatoes and dressing. We can eat the veggies, pickles, and various other foods. Candied yams, pumpkin pies, the whole nine yards!! (Recipes for this stuff are in the Recipes sub-forum.) The kids may have been here for a few years at school, but they've never had a Thanksgiving dinner until they sit down at the perfesser's table.

This year we'll have 5 from Nepal (one is back for his third year and his friend will be here for her second, the other three are juniors or seniors.) One is from Japan (been trying to get him to come for a couple of years. The kid is so darned polite and proper, I can't get him to unbend at all. He's been here for a few years, but the American culture hasn't dented his upbringing one bit. Should be interesting to ask him to pass the gravy!!) One more fills it out, but I'm not sure if he's coming. He's from China (another formal student very uncomfortable interacting with authority figures.)

I tried to get a couple of kids from Moldova, but they're all going to Chicago for a different kind of cultural experience!! The Pakistani from Saudi Arabia was pulled home by his dad because he didn't get the grades required. (Hate to be at that airport greeting!!)

Peanut and I are grateful for the chance to have these students share time with us. We haven't been doing it many years, but have already have had students from every continent except Australia. It's fun to pull out the world map after everything's cleared away and talk about our homes. Speaking of cleared away, these kids are great at doing dishes!!

The next week, I'm the authority figure again, and the week after that I issue the grades, but for a day, I get to be a human with them. And I'm grateful for that chance.

CT

[sparkpeopleup]

Yesterday, I took a good look at all of the things my fiance' did for me as we went through the day. I feel like a princess! I never realized how much the little things can add up when you're really looking at them.

First, I had fresh water waiting by my bed when I woke up. Second, he had everything set up and set out for my breakfast when I went downstairs. At snack time he brought me a few crackers with peanut butter (I never said anything about hunger but I was hungry). He made me a protein shake for lunch, again, without me asking or saying anything.

At no point during the day was my bottle of water ever close to empty, he fed the cats at lunchtime, which is my job...I thought. This man changes the cat litter every few days..again, I thought that job was mine too, but everytime I go to change it, it's already done. I made dinner, after we ate I didn't even get a chance to take a deep breath before he picked up the dishes and went to wash them.

I am going to bed with fresh water, and medicine for my flu if I need it. I've been sick for about a month, and what I never realized is that he did most of this before I got sick. If I am thankful for nothing else in my life, I am thankful for this man that makes me feel like royalty.

And I haven't even had my surgery yet! He just does this stuff to do it! Thank you Perfesser. I say thank you a lot, but I never tell him how thankful I am to have him. I'm going to do something extra special this Thanksgiving and for Christmas. I just never realized....Wow he must REALLY love me that much....

[Perfesser]

Sounds like a keeper, Theresa!! Don't you find that when you see him doing all these special little things for you that it makes you want to do the same for him?

Love's a two-way street or it ain't love.

Enjoy being treated like a princess! Looks like you're the queen of his heart!!

CT

[Tigerfly]

I love this... we too often take for granted what our spouses do for us and I believe that I am the absolute most guilty of this! My DH is a "house husband" and on a daily basis does dozens of things that make my life easier, he is so under appreciated by my entire family... he cooks, he does laundry, he does all of the shopping for all of us not just food... we never run out of razors or shampoo or even SOCKS! he knows exactly when we need them and they just appear in the drawer! He also coaches wrestling basically full time on a VOLUNTEER basis for inner city kids. Somehow he found the time yesterday to pick my best friends 7 & 8 year old up from school and take them to Borders to pick out new books because he spends an hour a day reading with them... honestly he is a freaking saint and I don't show him how much I appreciate him often enough... Thanks perfesser for kicking me in the behind!