Quote:
Originally Posted by dyingtobethin  Well most women acept so much less than they deserve only because they are over weight and feel like they can not get any better. |
As a man (Or at least I was lat time I checked
) I have a little difficulty with this concept. Its almost like saying "well this guy/girl is not good, or attractive enough for me
but they will do while I'm fat but as soon as I'm thinner they can be dispatched to the dumpster".
I'm sure that DTBT didn't mean it to come across that way but strip it down and that's what we are saying here.
I can see that where one partner is huge they might feel that they have to put up with a less than ideal, or even far from ideal situation because they fear otherwise being left alone, that they might be prepared to take crap from a partner that they wouldn't accept if they were thinner, but I do have a concern over this, and what it says about us former fatties
My other half is a gorgeous little thing. No two ways about it, she is a fine looking woman. She even now is way out of my league and if I hadn't snagged her when we were kids when I was still devilishly handsome and fit as a fiddle, I'd never have had a chance with her. Certainly when I was 400 pounds, asking her to be mine would have been embarrassing in the extreme. Turning this concept on its head then, as my weight shot up to baby blue whale proportions would it have been acceptable for her to say, you know we just don't want the same thing any more, I want to walk and have a life, and you want to eat yourself to death
Again please don't see this as a criticism of either DTBT or Tigerfly because it's not meant to be at all. I'm sure that Tigerfly has tried every angle to make her relationship work post op, but that sometimes outlooks, attitudes, and maybe even insecurities can lead couples to drift apart. No its the concept that I find mildly disturbing that as fat people we would almost prostitute ourselves (Please take that word in the spirit I intend it) in an attempt to accept unworthy partners that we don't really want to be with rather than be left on the shelf.
Or am I way off beam here?
8 year relationship comes to an end... 
So long as you are putting your best foot forward, then, 
I just wanted to give you a big hug. Since I can't reach you, this will have to do. Sometimes the hardest decisions to make are the ones that are best for everyone involved. Good luck to you... I just hope you're happy. Know that you have friends here to talk to if you ever need us. 
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