[bertie]

Since I don't know what I'm going to need as far as help goes (from hubby) when I get home from the hospital, does anyone have any suggestions so he knows what to expect? For example, am I going to need help walking to the bathroom/getting dressed/etc.? Things like that would be helpful to know, and anything else you can think of. Thank you in advance!

[bluedelight]

It all depends on how you do in the operation for the most part and most people do very well. Some people come home as single parents and take care of their kids day-one.

I would suggest not depending too much for some of what you suggested. You need to do things on your own, you need to move around, you need to exercise.

He can drive you if you need to get out. He can support you for the mental ups and downs you may have. He can encourage you when you need it and cheer you on, offer compliments on how well you are doing.

If you have children, he can take on the majority of the role taking care of them over the next few weeks. He can do more physical chores around the house.

But you do not want to become complacent and sit back and not take a more physical and active role to your own recovery.

You also need to become more independent right from the start because in all honesty, you dont know what your husband's true reaction will be and for some people, signs of jealousy, misunderstanding and general fear from their partners starts showing up.

You will be tired for a couple of days, may have some minor gas pain for a day or so, perhaps some of your emotions running all over the place, but for the most part, while somewhat of a risky procedure like all elective surgeries are, this is a pretty non obtrusive procedure and you will heal quickly and be able to do quite a bit very quickly on your own.

Best of luck and enjoy the journey. I am just over 2 1/2 years out and that journey is still continuing for me as part of my life now.

[tcgc0114]

Morning! It all depends on the type of person you are!

Personally, I hate "bothering" people, so I didn't need any help really. I had surgery on Monday and had the nurses help me out of the bed that evening (husband had to go home to be with my little ones). I was on my own in the hospital all Tuesday, so I got myself in and out of bed/got to the bathroom by myself. As long as I kept on top of the pain meds, I was fine!

Hubbie was with me at home on Wednesday, but I was alone Thurs & Fri. I just made sure to get up and walk laps around my living room throughout the day; I made dinner (albeit an easy one) for my family - anything to keep me busy and keep my life as normal as possible. I was back to driving 1-week out.

Good luck!

[sarahg]

Everyone's experience is different. Some days I wanted to do it all myslef, then other days I accepted I had limitations and let him take care of my needs. My advice for your hubby is just to be there for you in any way you need. And my advice for you is to let him. You're going to have bad days when you hurt and you'll need help out of bed, making meals, and showering. Other days are going to be great and you'll be able to walk those laps around the house with little help. I was semi emotional for the first couple weeks and my fiancee didn't understand what was wrong, but he was great about letting me vent. That meant a lot. This whole experience has been a great opportunity to build our bond. Be patient with yourself and with each other.