Hi all,
I am so happy I found this site. I just invested in over $300 worth of Medifast shakes so I can lose weight... until it dawned on me... umm, I HAS GASTRIC BYPASS SURGERY!!! surely my tool is a bit rusty, but I am assuming its there waiting for me to use it appropriately. At least I hope... time will tell.
I had RNY lap surgery 5 years ago. It was a rocky, rocky road. I was in the hospital for 3 months on a feeding tube and TPN being fed thru a tube in my neck. I had perforated ulcerations at the stoma site and nothing would heal it. They thought I was going to die. Imagine- I did the surgery to save my life and I was going to die from it???? Finally I healed... I was released from the hospital and then had to return for yet another month for the same issue. I thought I made the biggest mistake of my life. I was 32 years old, let my weight get to 316 lbs at 5'10" and was letting life just pass me by. I felt the surgery was my only option...
A month or so went by and I was so angry at myself for not having the 'will power' that everyone told me was inside of me to just go on a diet and hit the gym. Of course, the people with the advice that made them feel like they just split the atom, were all thin and never had to battle a food addiction... and all of the hell that accompanies it. Suddenly, something clicked.... weight was coming off.... I was feeling so much better about myself... no longer did I want to hide in my house with a pizza on a date with myself, but now I wanted to go out into the world and enjoy my life. It was amazing how quickly I got past the anger at my surgery for almost killing me... I had dropped a significant amount of weight in no time at all...
A year later I was down 90 something pounds... By a year and a half, my weight loss ceased at about 180 pounds.. I'm very tall, by the way... and I looked great in clothes (out of clothes, not so much, lol) and felt like I owned the planet!!!! I met the man of my dreams and even though I was told I could not conceive because of PCOS and the fact that I did not ovulate, the weight loss must have fixed some problems b/c there I was.... married and pregnant with my first child.
Pregnancy hormones are NO JOKE! I went from being a sweet and doting wife to a complete psychopath... crying, laughing, yelling, screaming... I am suprised my husband did not get a vasectomy, hahaha. I gained 60 lbs in my pregnancy!!! All of the pain that I had from the surgical complications completely subsided while I was pregnant and I knew no limits. I always say it was like an outer body experience, where I lacked all control of what I said, did and ATE!!!! But in the end, I owned every pound I gained. At my 6 week post partum visit, 40 lbs had fallen off. Ahhhh, thank g-d... it was not all fat!!!! I tried to diet to lose the rest and just could not get in the swing of things. I had been away from the WLS mindset for so damn long that I forgot.. completely forgot... that I ever even had the surgery!!! How could that be? Oh, it be, my friends!!! I joined WW and fell off the wagon, only to rejoin 20 lbs heavier......
Fast forward exactly 2 years after the birth of my son. I was pregnant again. Instant crazy woman again!!! Not only did I expect him to get a vasectomy for sure this time, but I am shocked that he did not run away from home or bury me in the back yard... I was THAT difficult to be around. On a side note, I was forunate that he remembered how kind and loving I was in between and before pregnancies, so he hung in there.. He's still my Prince Charming (ok, maybe not entirely charming all the time, but definately my Prince)
I gained another 50 lbs in my 2nd pregnancy. I lost 40 pounds almost immediately after birth... so now I was up a total of 50 pounds! I went on Medifast and lost 20 pounds pretty quickly and then.....
After my son's 2nd birthday, after a year of Early Intervention for what we chalked up as being significant delays and no attempts at speech or connecting with us, he was diagnosed with Autism. Broken Heart.. Insert Food!
My daughter, who is exactly 2 years younger than my son was diagnosed with MR at 7 months, and then Autism and a host of other disabilities on her 1st birthday. That party was not fun AT ALL for anyone, as I was not the happiest of hostesses.
I could not eat and lost almost 30 lbs. I went into a major depression and could not sleep trying to read every bit of info I could on their disabilities and read every research study. My doctor put me on Lexapro for situational depression.....
Now, almost a year later (my baby girl will be 2 in May), I have 80 pounds to lose! I swear to you that half of that is just from Lexapro. Turns out that weight gain is a side effect... but the meds work like a charm for my worries about my babies. I went on an 800 calorie/day liquid diet and walked and went to the gym daily and gained another 6 pounds!!!!!! They should call Lexapro an antidepressant/depressant... who would not get depressed gaining weight on a strict diet?????
My doctor put me on a low dose of Wellbutrin with the hopes that it can offset the weight gain issues from Lexapro. I have been on it only 2 days and I feel like I am on a fistful of anphetamines!!! My house has never been cleaner, lol, since I cannot stop cleaning!!! That's the only good part so far.
I remembered that I had the surgery. I spoke with my surgeon, who knows about my life's circumstances because I am still friends with his nutritionist, and he was so supportive and understanding. He was a bit of a tyrant years back, but he wants to help me now. I am so embarassed I cannot even bring myself to go there and have them see me, but I will. He talked about the Stomaphyx with me and I am thinking about it.
I realize, however, that I need to accept what has happened and try on my own (I can't afford the Stomaphyx if insurance won't cover it and I don't want to get my hopes up and then be disappointed). I am wanting to go 'back to basics' like when i was first pre-op. The broth, jello and popsicles..... except it is not with that awesome fear I had when I first had the surgery. It was so great to not be tempted to try things back then because of the fear of pain. That part won't happen. Well, not the physical pain. I am hoping that maybe my pouch is still viable and that I still have the malabsorption from the WLS. Not sure, as I have heard that it can potentially reconnect itself? Not entirely certain if that is fact or myth. I am pretty positve that my pouch and stoma are stretched out.
So, I started my WLS journey all over again. I did not eat today, just like the day of my surgery. Tomorrow will be water... etc....
If anyone has been in the same boat with significant weight gain and then going back to basics and losing, I would love to hear from you. Please share what worked for you and what didn't. Any insight would be so very appreciated.
By the way, if you are preop, please do not be discouraged by the complications I had, as they were extremely rare. I have seen other problems (strictures, etc.) that are more common, but I was an enigma. And I would do it all over again... a million times over with no regrets!!!!! The life I have now, I would never trade for anything!
Thanks for listening to me babble.
Peace, love and hugs,
Cari
What did I Do to myself??? sigh..... 
lol. stick to the plan. get moving. you'll be fine 
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