[Perfesser]

Saturday up on the mountain, it all came together for me. You've heard me go on about the benefits of WLS and the life changes it makes, but up there it just clicked and everything came into focus.

For years (decades?) I had been restricted in what I could allow myself to think of doing. We had been to the same campground before with the family. On those occasions, I hadn't been able to go very far from the parking lot because of the mobility issues involved in walking in the forest and stepping over roots and things. I hadn't been able to get to the river that flowed 50' behind the tent because of a tricky step down into a ditch. I had huffed and puffed (and almost blowed my self down) walking two campsites over to the restroom building. Life at 8,000' was miserable in some of the most beautiful scenery in the country. My spirit was willing, but my flesh said "no way, no how!"

This year was different. This year I was alive!! This year I was Superman - I could fly!! I got up early Saturday morning and went back and forth to the river a half-dozen times to take pictures of it in different lights as day broke. I hardly broke a sweat, and I never ran out of steam in camp (unlike my poor wife, who is still earthbound).

I could never have allowed myself to think of going hiking with the others. No way I could have made the first 200 yards of trail, which is the bottom end of the bunny slope at Brighton Ski Resort. The trail starts at 9,000' and goes up from there. I'd have broken into a profuse sweat getting out of the car! Saturday, I had something to prove to myself. I had to show myself that I was finally licensed to LIVE again! So I set what I thought was a reasonable pace for the oldest guy there and the least in shape. And I held that pace all the way up, carrying a heavy camera case, and beat the kids!! Blew me away!! No way!! WAY!!

We went up to a higher lake at 10,500'. I beat the youngsters again, and a teenaged niece told me I had challenged her with the pace I set. She is in incredible shape and is supremely fit, as she's studying dance. Want a super boost to your self-image? Whip a kid into the ground vertically!!

So there I was, standing at the edge of a lake two miles up. I had flown there! The realization set in that I am finally FREE!!! The body obeys my will now! There is NOTHING I cannot do!!

Only a person who 8 months ago could not tie his boots without needing CPR can relate to this. I couldn't walk slowly up one flight of stairs without staining my shirt. You all know the limitations we accept (or used to!) without consciously realizing it. Saturday, I understood in a very real, personal way that those limits have been shattered and I can now LIVE again!!

I felt so incredibly alive up there!! I never even noticed that there's no oxygen and I was supposed to be gasping on the floor. I've said it before, but I was FREE!!! Life tasted so good! It was a mind-blowing revelation.

Without WLS, I would be heavier and more miserable than I was last year, and I wouldn't even know any better! Now, I have no restrictions!

I know I'm repeating myself, and even so, I don't think I'm really getting down what I felt up there. I have a new life. I have been resurrected without having to die first! I am reborn!!

I wish I had the skill to express myself properly. Something significant happened up there near the timber line. Without WLS, it would have been impossible. Without the support of all of you on the board here, it would have been exceedingly difficult. You are awesome. I hope you are each able to experience an epiphany like this. Challenge yourself to do the (pre-op) impossible. Nail that thing! Experience this power for yourselves!!

Was WLS easy? Heavens no!! Would I do it again in the same situation? Hell yes!!! In the proverbial heartbeat! There is a new life waiting for each of us to claim, whether it's me flying up a mountain, Diana tending the World's Largest Vegetable Garden by herself, or any of you just getting down on the floor with a child!

This is one wild ride, and it's worth every hassle, every pain, every setback, and every fear we ever had and beat. This is the real deal!! Those who have gone far enough down the path know what I'm saying. To the newbies, hang on tight, your life is just starting!!

CT

[ksummer19]

Oh my goodness you have made me cry. I have not expierenced what you have this week but I sure do know what you mean. Just tonight I chuckled at myself because I was running up the stairs. Ha, that never would have happened 6 months ago. So many different wows that you forgot was missing in your life.

Prefesser you express yourself beautifully. I wish I could do the same. Thanks for your posts!

Now, I need to go find some tissue to wipe my eyes.

Drive safe home.

[kitty56]

Professer, you said it perfect. Your post almost brought me into tears to, becasue everything you said is how I feel too. It has changed my life so much and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. Life is just so wonderful!!!!

[DocSanae]

BRAVO

[minnesotashopper2]

This post should be a front page for everyone who comes to this site can read....especially those that are preop, or looking into what their life may become if they work the plan.
There is nothing more anyone can add to this, but an
AMEN TO YOU!
Get back here safe!

[kimtindall]

You definately have a way of putting things in perspective!! You ROCK!

[Imlosinit]

CT~ What an emotional post. I haven't been where you are but your feelings came shining through in your post. I agree with Lori, this should be Front Page!!!! I haven't had my surgery yet and it makes me want the day to hurry up and come. I know the limitations you're speaking of. I think about them all the time... all the things I could do with my toddlers if only......

Have you thought about being a motivational speaker for WLS support groups?? You'd be incredible!!!!

Also, the way you are with words...have you considered writing a book about your journey?? I'd certainly read it.

[angelmolly20]

What a wonderful post. I know that feeling and it is the greatest. Just goes to show you that there is much much more in store for you. Just sit back and enjoy the great journey ahead of you and always remember that feeling you had climbing up there. That alone is going to get you through the years ahead.....people out there think that WLS is the easy way out....that maybe I was to lazy to do it myself...._(well I did it myself, more than once.....and it came back) I dont tell alot of people, (and I had it done 4 yrs ago. ) Thats why finding this site is such a relief. Being able to see how others feel, how they get through different stages of this journey.
Again...GREAT job professer....keep up the good work.

[Perfesser]

Originally Posted by Imlosinit

Have you thought about being a motivational speaker for WLS support groups?? You'd be incredible!!!!

Also, the way you are with words...have you considered writing a book about your journey?? I'd certainly read it.

Thanks, Martha, for your kind words!

When I went to my wife's information meeting last month I had the chance to tell the group a bit about the journey and my experience, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. (I had some nice positive feedback from some of the folks there, too.) I spend my workdays in front of classes of students who aren't necessarily interested in what I have to say, so I know how to handle large groups, and I've given a couple of short courses for professional societies. There aren't a lot of support groups nearby, but I'd be willing to give it a shot if someone wanted me to.

As for writing the book, I can't get involved in a project like that until I get tenure at the university. One major life-constipating project at a time! I'll let the group know if I ever do, though!

CT

[FinallyFree]

Two people have walked past my office to ask me if I'm OK because I'm crying while reading your post, Perfesser. It gives me so much hope. I chose the name "Finally Free" because that's how I want to feel as I get further in this journey--free from the things I haven't been able to do or wasn't comfortable doing because of my size. I refuse to be limited anymore. Your post expressed what I hope to experience perfectly. Congratulations on your life-changing experience, and good luck to all of us on the same path!