[bonfire]

Kenyar, Your such a beautiful person. I can tell by your chats that your that way inside and out. I too have been in therapy all my life and I can tell you I changed therapists several times! I am 52 and a single Mom to one son who is 28. I lost my job after 20 yrs, lost my home, filed bankruptsy and then the health problems started. I thought about this surgery for a long time before I made the final decission. It does not fix everything when we lose weight as we all know. You have to love yourself. I didn't for a long time. Think of this time as a new birth. Start some new hobbies, take a class if you can, read books and remember WE are always here for you too! You give so much input in return and it's nice that you need some back. Helping others only brings joy to all of us. There is NO contract that you have to go to this therapist. Do you have family you can turn to? Hang in there sweetheart! Don't give up!

[Kenyar]

thanks everybody. i go thru bouts of depression/ insecurity during TOM. it's pretty severe. i mean i dont want to hurt myself or anything, i just get REALLY down on myself. I will have to talk to my dr about this next month at my 6 month follow up. I am not sure if there is anything that I can take because the hormones are all messed up. i may just have to ride it out until everything stabilizes, who knows. thanks for the kind words as always.

[grandiose16]

Girls, I am sorry for all the emotional ups and downs. I think it is normal for people like us that are responsible good peple. Otherwise things would not bother us. Kenya, I have told you before what an astonishing wonderful person you are. THat was not BS. YOu have admitted to yourself what needed to be done to take care of yourself and your daughter and then DID IT. You are a determined responsible person. You are a beautiful person inside and out. You are a little lost right now and that is not uncommon. BUT don't start doubting yourelf.
I will tell you I believe in the power of prayer and having a relationship with God. HE is always there for you even when no one else is. Pray that his Will be done and that he will guide and protect you. HE will help you find an inner peace that no one else can.
I don to go to church every Sunday and I am not a GOD finatical person, but I do find peace and and a sense of tranquility when I talk to HIM. I am sure it will help you too.
With love and caring, Mattie

[MsVickie]

I just now read this. Kenya, When I read this I said dam that WAS my life at your age. Im gonna set your weight aside. Yes its played a part of you for a long time but....... you have somthing in you wanting to get out.........and you have to do it before you pop. I dont know what that is. You do im sure. Me....? I wanted to go back to school and become a nurse. I did it. Tough Oh YEAH!!! Was it worth it Oh YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Was a I poor and broke before hand Oh yeah......... and during and after for a bit. I think its somthing we all go through. Your not insane honey... just human. As far as your past..... make a peace with it. Inside. Until you do you cant move ahead.