[ChuppyGirl]

If I'm 165 cm (5.3 foot) tall, what is my ideal weight?

we used to be told that it's like if you're 165cm, you should be ((165-100)-15kg)=50kg

Yikes, Can I reach this weight? I don't like skinny looking women, I don't want to reach the weight that I can count my ripes or see the bone of my hips when I wear pants!

Curious!

[SHH]

Hey there pal. I put your height into my BMI calculator, and it says anywhere from 51-68 kg would put you in what is considered a normal weight range. 70 puts you in moderately overweight. I too am 5' 3", Right now I weigh 150, and I think I look good, but according the the BMI chart, I am still considered moderately overweight. While I would like to lose about 20 more pounds, I am comfortable where I am now, so I will see how it goes. You just need to make sure you are healthy, and comfortable with your self. Take care pal. S

[DocSanae]

The medical standard.
BMI 18.5-24.9 is considered normal weight range, with the median, 22.
With the metric system, square your height in meters (e.g. 1.65 x 1.65 for you) and multiply by 22. That will get your weight for BMI 22 in kilograms.

For you, BMI 22 = 59.9 kg
BMI 18.5 -24.9 = 50.4-67.8 kg

Keep in mind, this surgery is considered a success if you can get off, and keep off, 60-70% of your EXCESS weight, that is, 60-70% of the weight you had above 67.8 kg, so the primary goal for a surgeon is most likely put there, though it does differ with surgeons, and there are those who will set the goal weight at BMI 24.9, while others will consider, where your body (not your conscious mind and emotion) ultimately decides to stay, is your goal.

(BTW, 1 inch=2.54 cm, 1 cm=0.3937 inch, so your height is just under 5' 5")

[ChuppyGirl]

Thanks SHH and DocSanae

Yikes that means I should change my ticker's end point from 145lbs to 132lbs!!!!! I still have 140lbs to go!!! I was not far from being midway from my old target 145lbs, with the new target I will get closer to the left end LOL!

As much as I am scared right now, as much I am very determined about my WL this time!
With the new life style I have choosen for myself I think I can do it, but maybe the last 20 or so lbs will be very diff to lose because it will be the weight of the excess skin and won't get rid of them unless I do the plastic surgery.

I have lived long 35 years with self image issues, I want to live the coming years with a full satisfaction about my image, and I don't want to enhirit my low self-esteem to my children. I know it's a big unforgettable scar that annoys every minute in my life, I don't want them to have the same pain

[ChuppyGirl]

OMG I still need to lose 63 kgs

I paled when I saw that number!

[DocSanae]

Chuppy, I say you should keep your ticker end point at 145. As I wrote, 22, or 59.9kg-132lb is what is considered the median point of the range of normal weight for you. In other words, medically, we consider people who are within that range "normal/ideal." It is not a good idea to have one single number stuck in your head as your "ideal" weight. If you do that, you are going to drive yourself crazy not getting there. This weight range is considered the weight range where you have the least health issues, and the longest life span.
As a matter of fact, if I were your dr, I would be telling you, your primary target weight is 60kg minus your starting weight then, lose another, 25kg or so if you can.
If you start thinking, I've lost only 29kg, I need to lose more than twice that much, you will get yourself into a negative thinking rut. You need to put yourself in a POSITIVE thinking mode for success. When was the last time your were able to lose so much in a few months, if ever? If you set your primary target at losing 60kg for now, you are almost halfway there. Think about the last 20-25kg when, and only when, you lose that first 60.

One baby step at a time, my lady. Not a gigantic leap. Your body will do what it needs to do in its own time, no matter what you think. If you let your head lead the way, you are going to be upset with every little thing that will seem to you is not going the way it should be. Do not get into the rut of, it should be this, it has to be that, and get upset because your body has its own schedule. You have to take life on its terms, not yours.

((((((HUGS)))))) Just believe that you will make it there, keep track of your eating and exercise, and let your body work out the schedule and amount in its own time, and you'll get where your body needs to be for the best of your health (you may not like to hear this, but it IS for the best of your health, not the best of your ego. )

[SHH]

I'm with you Doc. Hanadi, don't change your goal. See how you feel when you get there. 145 just might be perfect for you. It all depends too on your body type, etc.

You are doing such an amazing job. S

[ChuppyGirl]

I wish if you ladies are physically here, I need a tight HUGGG
I'm crying now while I'm typing this post, I feel like I snapped when I changed my weight goal to the ideal one, I felt totally helpless and have never lost a pound during the last 4 months!

DocSanea, you're absolutely right I'm driving myslef crazy with this ego I have in my stubborn personality. In fact I use the same mentality in every single situation in my life. I feel like I am in a challenge with everything (Please God firgive me, sometimes I feel I'm in a challenge with him!) God forbids I'm nothing to his praise and endless power!! I'm the most humble creature on this earth!! eeehhh part of it is the way I've been brought up with this mentality.

Please don't get me wrong I'm not a weiner who puts the blame on this and that I fully handle the consequences but I've been raised up to become the best in everything, to become the raw model for my brothers and sisters (I'm the eldest) to become the top of my class. Mom thinks I'm the most beautiful between my sisters, the most intellegent, I should be the best daughter, the most loving and beloved person in the family, the best mom for my childeren and not to depend on the nannies, the best wife, the best...... AAAAAAAAA I wish if I can hold my head and shake it so hard to get rid of these voices. I'm tired

I need to learn how to relaxe!

[DocSanae]

((((((((HUGS)))))))))
I hope a good night's sleep has restored your spirits if only a bit.

Originally Posted by ChuppyGirl

...I should be the best daughter, the most loving and beloved person in the family, the best mom for my childeren and not to depend on the nannies, the best wife, the best...... AAAAAAAAA I wish if I can hold my head and shake it so hard to get rid of these voices. I'm tired
I need to learn how to relaxe!

What you need to do is REVOLT against your mother.
I mean it!!
You need to separate YOUR goals from your MOTHER'S goals. I've seen this in a lot of women, in different degrees.
I've experienced it myself, too, but fortunately for me, my choice of career was not exactly what my mother wanted for me, so once I got admitted to medical school (my mother did not speak to me for two weeks after I received the notice of admission but I was stubborn enough not to apologize or make excuses to her, and years later, she said to me how glad I was a dr, having completely forgotten how upset she had been all those years ago ) I was able to set up my own goals and not replace my true goals with my mother's intents, and make a mistake in thinking that her intents were my goals as well.

I am not a psychiatrist by training, but I know enough to understand that for many women, whatever goals they pursue are often actually the goals and desires of their mothers who themselves have not been able to pursue them for one reason or another, so "brainwash" their daughters, and the daughters pursue these goals thinking they are their own, when these goals are their mothers' disguised as their own.

I am not saying right at this moment, but somewhere along the way, you may have to separate what you really want and need, from what your mother has made you think you want and need. (Do not blame your mother or your father about this, as basically, it's the cultural background that puts family duties and connections above individual needs that accounts in a large part for defining the gender roles.)
As society changes, the demands of womanhood also change.
There will be things that we need to take personal care of more than our parents generation, while other things, we can divert to the care of others that our parents would consider should be personally seen to, so we can concentrate on what we really need to do.

There is lots more that I can tell you about myself that you probably will be relate to, but it's going to get too long, so I'll stop for now. I don't mind putting my thoughts here, but for now, I'll stop. I probably will PM you later when I can set aside some time.

Right now, you probably are in a time crunch preparing to leave for your graduate studies, and that stress is also adding to your roller coaster emotions. Don't beat yourself up for your present state of mind (I read one of your posts elsewhere where you were upset about being upset and apologizing, but there is no need to apologize, you are going through what anyone will go through, were their situations the same as yours, and so everyone understands), just take a deep breath, and say to yourself, "This too shall pass."

((((((((HUGS))))))))

[Becca]

Well i'm 5, 6, and when i was at the dr's last week, i looked on the BMI scale and i'm now at 35 i think it was........

I was also looking at the scale if i get down to 140 like i wish and hope i do, it will be in the light green, and it stops at that no lower, for my hight.

My dr said 140 was a good weight but, he said i should and will go lower than 140. (i dont see it right now)...... But the scales dont have a listing for that low. For my hight.