[ljbfish]

i'm so glad to have found this website... my sister just had gastric bypass surgery about 10 days ago, and i am so proud of her... i was hoping for any good, sound advice for these beginning weeks and months... what does one need from loved ones? i am visiting this weekend, with hopes of stocking her freezer with yummy things that she can look forward to when it's time. is this a good idea?

[dixieladybug]

How wonderful to have such a caring sister. She should have some info somewhere that tells what she can have at what stage. Yes you can put it in small bowls and freeze it.Good luck to your sister on her new life journey.

[Perfesser]

1) Don't try to force her to eat. She'll eat what she can, when she's ready, but the penalty for stuffing is severe!

2) Don't tempt her with her old favorites. Most of them helped her get to the point of needing surgery. Her new pouch can be a strict taskmistress, and it will not take kindly to sugars or fats, and maybe other stuff, too.

3) Be positive!! She will need all the reinforcement she can get to help her through the first month or two. She will have plenty of folks telling her all kinds of ignorance. You need to be a safe haven to understand and accept the new limitations she will be feeling, even if you don't understand them yourself. (Search the forums for the keywords "easy way" to get an idea of what I'm talking about!)

4) Search the recipes sub-forum and find things you can make as a puree to break up the monotony! Sure, there are a hundred and one ways to fix cottage cheese, but most folks can't get past #76 without going berserk!!

5) Be a loving sister. Of course, it sounds like you've already got this one nailed!!

This could be an emotional time for her. Ride it out with her and hold her hand. Then bring her over here and introduce her to us! We don't bite!!

CT

[DocSanae]

Welcome to the board, thank you for joining us.
Wishing both you and your sister the best.
((((((HUGS))))))

To add to what the others have said. The best thing you can do, is to have a good ear, and listen to her, be patient with her. Early out, the very difficult aspects of adjusting to the new life--yes it is a new life because what your sister is embarking on has several rules that she must stick to for the rest of her life for lifelong success--can be tough, so having a good supportive and non-judgmental ear will help her a lot. Please keep in mind that you can no longer make food a reward for something--it is going to be only a fuel to sustain life and good health, so the prespective on food will change. That said, having things ready in the freezer in the manner da perfesser has said, is a very good idea.

[decker1976]

Welcome and thanks for joining us. What a great sister you are! Emotional support is critical, especially in the early days. Emotions may seem like a roller coaster ride. Try not to take things personally-it's the hormones and effects of rapid weight loss as well as surgery. Good luck!

[lynMA]

this is all good sound advice.... give her lots of support and listening!!!!

[Aliswife]

Wow!! This is the first time I have seen a family member looking for ways to support someone who had the surgery.

All the responces u have gotten are exactly what she will need. The focus in her life will no longer be food. I don't know how much food u will want to prep up for her as her tastes and tolerance will change from da to day.

Just support and love....tell her constantly how proud u r of her, love her and listen. This process is all consuming mentally and the adjustment come in slow waves. Be as supportive four months out as u are today. Her journey has just began and it is a hard jorney that will need all ur patience and support.

I am glad u r here! Look into the recipie section and you will be able to help her with some eating options.

You may also want to encourage her to stay away from T.V. The massive amount of food comercials are intensified and can be overwhelming (it was for me).

Best of luck!

[kitty56]

Everyone gave such wonderful ideas for you to help your sister, there is really nothing that I can add that has already been said. Your sister needs all the support and understanding from you. You need to support her different way of eating and like professor said never tempt her with old favorites becasue she needs to eat healthy. I would say do not buy to much becasue she even does not know what is going to settle well in her new stomach. I made the mistake and bought alot of tuna and smoked oysters and some other things that I stocked up on. Before surgery I loved smoked oysters and to this day I have such a hard time eating them and it took me over a year before I could eat tuna without gagging on it. Her tastes are going to change alot. In time she might get to likeing it again. She needs you to be there for her to help her thew the rough spots in her journey. I was so lucky to have famliy and friends that where there for me all the time. Then there might be a time that she will look back once she loses alot of weight and wonder why she did what she did to get to where she was. I think there where quite a few who did that and I was one of them. Reassure her that was in the past and has to look to the new her but never forget where she came from. Life is to short to live in the past and have to live for now and her whole new life that she is going to have. She is going to love it when she finds all that energy that she thought that she did not have and with the weight loss that energy really gets big.

[Queenofthenilerevisited]

You are a very sweet sister. I lived off of s.f popsicles, applesauce, cottage cheese, s.f instant breakfast.

[Perfesser]

At some point she will also realize that this is a completely fundamental shift in her lifestyle and how she eats. As fat people, we thought we loved food, but actually we loved eating food. Eating now may become a chore, and she could lose interest in fixing food. Many of us have. (That's why a freezer well-stocked with good food choices is so valuable at our place!) And this is for life, unlike any diet she has ever tried.

She will have to relearn eating and choose healthy food in small amounts forevermore.

A couple of things more you can do to reinforce good behaviors would be to nag her (in the sweetest way possible) to drink at least 64 ounces a day of non-caffeinated, non-carbonated sugar-free fluids and get in at least 60 grams of protein a day. She'll have to work up to it post-op, but be assertively supportive of this goal. The other thing is, once she gets back on solid food, make sure she chews every bite slowly and thoroughly!! This alone can prevent so much problem, you just can't believe it!!

Wow, you've sure gotten a lot of insight into her new world!! Hope this helps you help her make the adjustments needed for complete success.

CT